Linda Hall: NZ doesn't need Chris Brown

Chris Brown should not be able to come to New Zealand, says Linda Hall.

I'm not one to follow celebrity gossip. Sometimes, however, you can't avoid it.

For instance, when Bruce Jenner became Caitlyn Jenner. The gold medal-winning track star of the 1976 Summer Olympics was a reality TV star in Keeping Up With The Kardashians (never watched it and don't plan to).

The story was everywhere - telly, radio, newspapers and front and centre of nearly every magazine.

The story was huge.

Not so huge but still getting plenty of attention this past week has been American rapper Chris Brown.

He wants to come to New Zealand with his One Hell of a Nite tour. However, he may not be allowed into New Zealand as he has been banned from two other countries because of his domestic violence record.

In 2009 he bashed his girlfriend, singer/songwriter Rihanna, and because both of them are public figures the assault and conviction was all very public.

It was quoted in American media that Brown "strangled, bit and repeatedly punched Rihanna in a car".

Biting and punching anyone, anywhere is bad enough but to me, doing it in the confined space of a car makes it much worse.

At least if you are on your feet you have a chance to back away or even run for it but sitting in a car, there is no escape - that makes him even more of a coward in my eyes.

So anyway, he wants to come to New Zealand to sing and dance for us. Well, too bad. As far as I'm concerned, he can stay away.

Why should he be allowed in? Just because he can sing?

Domestic violence is rampant in New Zealand. We need to make the message loud and clear: there are consequences for bashing people up and those consequences don't just disappear with time, money or fame.

On the Immigration New Zealand website the "key message" is: all non-New Zealanders coming to New Zealand must be of good character.

Brown is not of good character. Good characters don't bite and punch people. That should be the end of the story.

You might remember me writing about getting attacked by a magpie a few weeks ago.

I've since found out it's a pretty common occurrence at this time of the year.

I've had all kinds of advice. Get off your bike and look at the magpie (no thanks), put a heap of cable ties on your helmet (um ... no), put a face on the back of your helmet (possibly).

My plan is to avoid them. Not so for Mr Neat, who sent me a text last week: "3/4 of an hour hard out attacked by a magpie, suppose I'm dressed like one" - what?

I rang and he told me he'd been out riding and a magpie had swooped on him, hitting his helmet.

I said, "What, you mean you were dressed like one?"

"I was wearing black and white."

Whatever. I thought he was having me on and told him so.

So yesterday morning we decided to bike to Clive. When we got to Whakatu Rd where the "attack" happened, Mr Neat said: "You stay on the track and watch." Off he biked down the road and sure enough, down swooped the magpie out of the macrocarpa tree.

It only took one dive and Mr Neat didn't even see it.

So on the way home he wanted to do it again. I warned him about antagonising the bird but no, off he went.

He rode along and nothing happened, so he turned back toward me and suddenly the magpie swooped in at him, side-on.

He didn't see it until it was nearly on him, then he whipped his head sideways.

I couldn't help but laugh, especially when he got back to me and said: "I've done something to my neck."

I think the magpie won that round.

-Linda Hall is assistant editor at Hawke's Bay Today.