Linda Hall: Childbirth no time for posing

Linda Hall

I don't like having my photo taken at the best of times, so the thought of someone taking pictures of me during or minutes after childbirth leaves me cold.

However, inviting a photographer along to your child's birth seems to be the latest trend in "recording the moment".

Honestly, I don't want to remember giving birth. It was not nice. Sure, if you could bottle that moment when the baby is born, the sheer and utter relief that it's over and you are still alive (I really did think my life was in jeopardy when I had my first baby) and the joy of knowing that you have a healthy baby, you'd make millions.

But the hours leading up to that moment are not something I look back on with fond memories. The saying "leaving your dignity at the door" when you arrive at a maternity annexe is very true.

Actually, women's bodies and minds tend to block the memory of the not-so-nice parts of labour and just as well, or there would be a hell of a lot of only children out there.

I'm sure photographers at births are very tactful and keep out of the way but even the thought of having someone I barely know in the room at what I believe is a very private and emotional time does nothing for me.

And really, why does everything have to be so polished these days? If you want photos - and the photos of newborn babies lying on their mother are simply beautiful - get your husband, partner, or even the midwife to take them.

We already live in such a public world. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram ... people sharing their lives at the touch of a button with anyone who cares to look. People post about what they ate for dinner, how many kilometres they have walked or run and what they did at work.

Or they post something like: "At home having a romantic night in with my man." Well, no, you are not having a romantic night: you're playing on your phone or computer. There shouldn't be a computer or phone in sight on a romantic night.

I sometimes wonder what happens when these people meet up with their friends. What do they talk about? I can imagine the conversation going something like this: "Oh yeah, I went to the movies last night to see ... " and before they can finish the friend would be saying: "Yeah I know, I saw it on Facebook last night when you got home."

Then ... silence ... because they both know everything that's happened in the other's life, down to what time they got out of bed.

I think some things should be private and for me, the birth of a baby is one of those things. It's a time for bonding, not posing. Yes, the shots are meant to be candid and not posed or intrusive but it doesn't matter how discreet a photographer is, you are still going to know they are in the room.

However, each to their own. Maybe I'm being old-fashioned.

I do, however, take my hat off to anyone who does birth photography. Being on call 24/7 and waiting around for hours on end can't be much fun. It wouldn't be an easy job, that's for sure.

I guess in the end it comes down to personal choice and what you feel comfortable with.

-Linda Hall is assistant editor at Hawke's Bay Today.