The Heretaunga Women's Centre is a place of warmth and care, not abuse, writes Fiona Fraser.
Fiona Fraser is the co-chair of the Heretaunga Women’s Centre
OPINION: Imagine you unlock your front door, throw it wide open, put the ‘welcome’ sign out, and allow any woman who needs a place to sit, talk, learn, share or cry to enter.
You make sure each woman in your home is spoken to with warmth and aroha.
She’s given tea and biscuits and as much support as you have available to her, and if you can’t help her with her challenges in that moment, you know you have neighbours and friends with similarly open doors who will do their best by her.
Now, imagine that a number of the women who have been welcomed inside respond with hurtful insults, threats, harassment and anger, creating fear and uncertainty in your home.
At Heretaunga Women’s Centre, we feel like the beautiful Art Deco building we’ve inhabited since 1993 is, indeed, our home, our whare.
It’s special – a place where women from all walks of life, from every culture and background – can come. It’s been a place of deep friendship and connection over many years, and also great pain.
Some of you will know that we lost our manager to cancer last year, and how much she meant to all who knew her. And some will have already had the pleasure of meeting our new manager, Deidrѐ Venter, who has been so willing to step up and throw her heart and soul into this role.
It’s a place that brings out the best in women – but recently, we’ve seen women at their worst.
The last couple of years have been incredibly hard for women in our community, and they’re often presenting with complex issues that might include family violence, joblessness, poverty, transiency, business failure, parenting concerns, ill health, addiction, isolation and loneliness.
A growing divide between Māori and Pākeha, those with and those without, adds to the trauma some of our women experience.
Watching services and resources dwindle, as economic conditions and central government decisions snatch them away, affects many in our community more than is typically acknowledged.
It makes perfect sense that some women would view the centre, and the fact that our resources are also affected and shrinking, as another closed door.
But we’re here to tell you the opposite is true. Our slogan – ‘for all women’ – means just that.
With the generous support of the Anne Marie O’Sullivan and Evergreen Foundations, we have completed the first stages of a rebrand and last month launched our new-look website, colour palette and merchandise.
The site is a reflection of all the women in our community we serve, those who volunteer countless hours for others, and the path we’re treading now.
If you’re not familiar with the support we offer, here’s a taste. Last year, in the counselling space alone we provided 351 regular counselling sessions and 175 urgent sessions.
We’re currently well-resourced for counselling and have no wait list for our free/koha based appointments.
We helped 622 women access advice and support across a range of areas such as family violence, mental health, and housing options.
We delivered 146 activities, workshops, support groups, and alternative therapeutic sessions too. 1,128 women participated and 94 women attended our free legal advice appointments. All sorts of women lead this amazing kaupapa and all sorts of women access it.
‘For all women’ means we can be led by an incredible South African, with our board and a large team of volunteers and staff members made up of wāhine Māori, wāhine Pākeha, and wāhine from Chile, Romania, Samoa, Ukraine, Thailand, Germany and many more countries and cultures.
Our women are mothers, or not, partners, or not. They’re gay, straight, unsure. They have big jobs, small businesses, they’re retired, or they’re receiving a benefit. They’re able bodied, differently abled, have their own homes, flat with four others, live with their parents, live in their car, or couch surf.
They see the world in a million different ways and we respect them all.
Our ask is that our whare – our really special home – and the women within it are afforded the same respect. That’s the only way we can make sure the door is wide open, and the welcome sign out for our community.