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Home / Bay of Plenty Times

Summer catch-up: Henry Makene on 'running through grief' following Hollie Snell crash

Leah Tebbutt
By Leah Tebbutt
Multimedia Journalist·Bay of Plenty Times·
7 Jan, 2020 09:00 PM3 mins to read

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In Tilly's last moments and in death she stayed true to her caring nature

"I have never been runner, I'm still not a runner and I still struggle."

This is Henry Makene's outlook on running - probably shared by many people.

But for Makene, running was not something he was going to give up.

Some would say he needed running more than it needed him.

Henry Makene cloaked in his mothers korowai, over his running gear. Photo / George Novak
Henry Makene cloaked in his mothers korowai, over his running gear. Photo / George Novak
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And then, almost a year since his mother, Teao "Tilly" Marjoribanks, died in a car crash, Makene crossed the finish line of the New York Marathon after running it in Tilly's name.

Essentially, he said, he "ran through his grief" from that fateful day.

"It is always sad when you lose someone and I understand that, but what do we do from that, when it does happen?" Makene said.

READ MORE:
Woman who died in Hollie Snell crash cared for others through life and death
'I can't remember last year': Hollie Snell the girl who came back from the dead

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Tilly was sitting in the passenger seat of her son's car on November 18, 2018, when the pair were involved in a two-car crash near Okere Falls that claimed Tilly's life.

Another Te Puke family's lives also changed that day. Teenager Hollie Snell was critically injured and in a coma but, after a miraculous recovery, has returned home and continues to defy the odds.

Discover more

New Zealand

'Are you ok son?': Mum's selfless last words after crash

08 Mar 07:21 PM
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'I can't remember last year': The girl who came back from the dead

15 Nov 07:48 PM

The Bay of Plenty Times spoke to Hollie 12 months on from the horrific accident and she said "I can't remember last year''.

''It was like I was taken away off this planet while my body had a long sleep."

Now she was slowly rebuilding her life after learning to talk and walk again while trying to maintain a positive mindset.

The crash almost took Hollie Snell's life. Photo / File
The crash almost took Hollie Snell's life. Photo / File

"Are you okay son?"

Those were the last words that passed through Tilly's lips, words her son will never forget, Makene told the Bay of Plenty Times earlier this year.

But Tilly stayed true to her character and in her last moments of life and into death Makene knows his mum continued to care for those around her.

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"That is all she would want, to make sure Hollie is okay. After all of this, Mum would have wanted that."

Hence why Makene persevered in his own grief to find his feet again - through, family, friends, professional help, but the Influence Running group being an integral part.

"My mother has always been a role model that, whatever we do in our lives, that we just move on and do our best.

"You either make two decisions, it can affect your mental stability and I could have gone down that path, but because of the support, they have helped me come through.

"Without it, I don't know where I would be."

Henry Makene ran the New York Marathon in his mother's name after spending a year "running through grief". Photo / George Novak
Henry Makene ran the New York Marathon in his mother's name after spending a year "running through grief". Photo / George Novak

Although Tilly still lives inside Makene - evident through his positivity - he misses the communication they once had.

"For months I would pick up the phone every day, just an automatic reaction to talk to her."

The loneliness crept in, but running helped Makene refocus and begin to enjoy life again.

"It becomes an addiction after a while. Whatever stress you are faced with, it just sort of eliminates that.

"To be honest I did not even think I would make it to this point."

Makene said he accepts what happened was purely an accident and it was not just his family who went through a "horrendous" time.

"But we don't want any reparation, we just want everyone to get on with their lives and make peace with this because that's how my mother was."

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