Staying mentally healthy after high school

Being a university student can be stressful for some.

The end of school is a relief for many -- all those exams finished, no more school uniform, and finally having freedom! But for some, the responsibilities of adult life -- whether at uni or in a full-time job -- can be crushing.

"Young adults may find themselves faced with a host of new and frequently very different values, norms and expectations that will challenge them daily -- from making career and course choices, lifestyle and values, independent living, financial realities, and emotional independence," says Mark Rainier, the head of counselling and career services at Massey University's Manawatu campus.

Struggling with the responsibility of making choices that feel like they could affect the rest of your life can be overwhelming, and Melanie Shaw, a Lifeline clinical specialist, and Miriam Sessa, a Kidsline co-ordinator, say that there is often pressure on school leavers to 'get it right' with big decisions.

For those who have a clear idea what career direction they want to take, the stress might arise from the pressure of achieving the required marks to get into the course they want. For those who are unsure, stress comes from making a decision they're not ready to make.

Dr Elizabeth Du Preez, a psychologist for Change It, adds that young people are often caught off-guard dealing with the daily demands of living, from shopping to washing, cleaning the flat and cooking, while finishing assignments or attending to deadlines.

"They can struggle immensely with time management and procrastination -- underestimating the time it will take to complete tasks and overestimating their own capacity to stay on top of things. They usually find it difficult to balance their new sense of freedom with the new set of responsibilities that come with a job or full-time study."

Preparation, not procrastination
Accepting there are potentially tricky times ahead is the best way to stop them from taking a toll on your new life outside of school. Du Preez notes preparation is the key.

"Make sure all the basic needs are taken care of: accommodation, food, and finances. This might take a bit of planning in the six months leading up to their transition into study or full-time work but is well worth the effort. After these things have been secured, focus on making time for play time, connecting time, time in, down time, and sleep time.

"School leavers are often used to parents and schools organising their lives for them, but they should gradually take responsibility for scheduling and planning, so that they can include most of these activities on a weekly basis."

Signs you could be stressed

Rainier points out that feeling anxious is normal and doesn't always mean there is anything wrong. But sometimes it can interfere with your ability to engage on campus or in the workplace, so getting professional assistance early is important.

"If it persists or is unusually strong then seek guidance -- most university counselling services have self-help websites and free counselling services that are confidential. Difficulty sleeping, loss of appetite, headaches, difficulty concentrating, forgetfulness, and lack of energy might all point to unhelpful levels of distress, and it is usually best for students to make contact with the services before they feel overwhelmed by their emotions."

Talk it through

For those who don't have access to tertiary counselling services, there are many websites and phone apps that can provide information and tools to promote well-being and mental health awareness. If you're not really sure what to look for, you can access information and do self-help tests on the Lowdown website (www.thelowdown.co.nz). Most importantly, talk about it.

The cure: Be more awesome

"The challenge is to make the most of the time to meet new and different people and try out new and different activities. It is important to remember some basic self-management strategies such as regular exercise, hygiene, a balanced diet, and appropriate sleep. Just because others around you may behave excessively, do not assume you have to mimic that behaviour or that the majority of students/young people are doing the same thing."

Shaw and Sessa also add that you might like to speak to a counsellor, GP, call a helpline, visit websites, or talk to a good friend because starting a conversation about what is happening for you is the first step toward getting the support you need.

Parents can help

For many parents, watching their children grow into adulthood and having to deal with the responsibilities that come with an independent life is a tricky time. While they may feel it is time to 'let go' and allow their children make mistakes and learn from them, it does pay to be on the lookout for signs of depression like sadness and hopelessness, irritability, tearfulness, or frequent crying and a loss of interest in activities.

"If you're unsure if your teenager is depressed or just 'being a teenager', consider how long the symptoms have been present, how severe they are, and how different the teen is acting from their usual self," say Shaw and Sessa.

Keep the communication lines open with your teen and talking things through in a calm, open and honest way is a good starting point to address any potential concerns."

Where to get help

-Youth services: (06) 355 5906

-Youthline: 0800 376 633

-Kidsline: 0800 543 754 (4pm to 6pm weekdays)

-Whatsup: 0800 942 8787 (noon to midnight)

-Depression helpline: 0800 111 757 (24-hour service)

-Rainbow Youth: (09) 376-4155

-www.thelowdown.co.nz

-www.depression.org.nz

--ERIN BOYLE/JET MAGAZINE