PARENTING MATTERS - Column

Riot with coffee the perfect blend
Going out for a cup of coffee. The most simple of pleasures.
Until you add small children to the equation.
We have just had my husband's parents out from England for two weeks and, being partial to New Zealand's frothy flat whites, it has been a whirlwind of cafes.
But our quest has not been to find the best coffee in town. No, our choice of establishments has come down to two simple criteria: Entertain and contain. Because, if you can't keep the kids in one place then you won't be staying in one place either.
From highbrow to child-friendly we have tried them all, with surprisingly similar results.
The cafe with the children's play area (that curiously had the latch on the inside of the waist-high door) caused the most commotion.
Miss 2 insisted on bringing the toys into the restaurant (which was forbidden by management) and threw a tantrum of Jurassic proportion when thwarted.
At the poolside cafe, she refused to get out of the pool.
And at the children's indoor playground she chose only equipment that required adult supervision (and participation). Between hubby and I, we left caffeine-free, with a broken toe and a friction burn from the inflatable slide.
In the end it was a notepad and pen I dredged from the bottom of my handbag that held her attention the longest.
(Although at the time she was strapped tightly into a highchair and lacked any possible means of escape.)
And thank goodness for fluffys.
The respite they provide might be brief, but it's golden.
While you are waiting for your drink, the kiddiewinks are sitting quietly beside you waiting for theirs.
And when it arrives, you have the precise amount of time that it takes to devour a marshmallow (or two at the more generous cafes) to drink it.
But our best weapon over the past fortnight would have to be safety in numbers.
If you drink your coffees relay-style, everyone gets to drink a full cup and burn the calories off straight after.
Or, another technique that worked quite well for us (unintentionally, of course), is to position yourselves centrally so that when your tantrum-throwing-tot boils over you have maximum coverage.
The other punters will gulp down their coffees at speed and exit en masse to escape the ear-splitting screams.
With the place to yourself, you can sit back and leisurely sup while the kids run riot.
Ahhh. Just like home.