Diary of a diva extraordinaire

Tarnished Frocks and Divas has become a Tauranga institution. Everyday women get to act, sing and dance in a major production that attracts thousands. This year, the indulge has its own daring diva. Media consultant Deb Batkins has debuted in the Mills Reef Tarnished Frocks and Divas show this week. Jenny Rudd chats to Deb about her journey - from nervous auditions to diva extraordinaire.

At the beginning of the year I moved from Wellington to Tauranga after a tumultuous relationship break-up. I was definitely in the mood for trying out new things - new job, new town, new life. I wanted to get back into the stage work that I had done throughout my life.

Tarnished Frocks and Divas is an epic, multi-layered, theatrical and fashion event that combines story, song, dance, reworked fashion, comedy and, most of all, style. All the performers are women over 40 but it really is designed to appeal to anyone - children over 8 years old, men, women of any stage. It's about empowering women and celebrating the great things in life. Held together by a cast of nearly 40 women, the wonderful Jackie Clarke (in her fourth appearance with the show), and directed for the second time by professional director Vanessa Byrnes. This year's show is based in a French restaurant called Alouette - "the skylark" - a slightly magical place "where spirits rise and sing". It celebrates all things French and Divaesque.

As a child I did ballet and other forms of dancing. I grew up doing theatre productions and talent quests.

When I was 18 I was living in Ohakune, working in a gas station pumping gas and changing tyres.

My friends talked me into entering Miss Universe. I was more used to hunting gear than swimwear but did it for a giggle. I got into the top five out of 700 entrants.

Over the years I have been in three bands as the lead singer.

I got to sing with Ray Woolf at one point. I've also done modelling, from Benson and Hedges fashion shows to Bendon. Over the years, I've continued to model and would love to do more for local fashion houses. I've also worked as a singer for radio and done TV jingles. I've been involved in television production, the highlight of which was interviewing Helen Clark.

I entered Tarnished Frocks and Divas for fun, but have got the stage bug again. Definitely want to do more.

June 14, 2011

Went along to the auditions at Mauao Performing Arts Centre. They already had all the models but I thought I would have a shot at a singing and dancing role.

What the heck, while I am here I might as well try for the acting too. I had to put together a song and go through some dance routines. I was surprised how nervous I was. I didn't want to screw up!

June 20, 2011

OMG! Got an email today telling me I have landed all three parts. I am also understudy to the main lead. I hope she doesn't go whitewater rafting or bungee jumping before September.

Sunday July 3, 2011

Today the cast met for our first rehearsal. I hadn't realised what a huge production this is going to be. There are so many aspects - stage design, art, props, models, dancers, singers, actors. I have three lots of rehearsals a week. Hope my old knee injury holds up.

Saturday, July 9

Shattered from work this week. Have I taken too much on? We have a two-hour dancing rehearsal, followed by two hours of acting and then two hours of singing. There is a really high standard of talent. We are starting to form some great friendships amongst ourselves.

Sunday July 10

I've been quietly freaking out about the acting side of the show. Today, we had to sit on a chair in character in front of everyone and answer questions fired at us by director Vanessa Byrne. It was way outside my normal comfort zone. It feels very different slipping into a character with acting. When you model, dance or sing you climb into the music which gives you the emotion, but when you act you are developing your character so you kind of evolve. I feel somewhat awkward but am determined to conquer my fear.

Saturday, July 23

Having had major knee surgery years ago, I'm finding it tough with some of the moves. My chiropractor is amazed how I can present myself with a bruised tail bone, ankles clicking and a clearly inflamed knee. I'm determined to beat it. I've been taking long, full-throttle walks to build up the muscles. The force of gravity is moving up - that's the wonderful thing with dancing, you use so many different muscles at one time in every part of your body.

Tuesday, July 30

Completely exhausted. Why am I doing this?! Had to cut my time short with my 13-year-old daughter Latisha over the weekend. She was completely cool with that, as she knows from her own school theatre productions the commitment needed. But it still doesn't stop me from feeling guilty. Some of the women have three children. I am in awe of how they juggle everything. I found it harder this evening at dance rehearsal to stay focused.

Saturday, August 27

Thank goodness I found my mojo again. I'm a detail personality type so I'm going to spend lots of time making sure I know exactly where I'm supposed to be. I hope I don't trip anyone up, or myself for that matter. The Bay of Plenty Times car park building is my practice studio during lunch breaks. The staff have been amused by this woman dancing around with an iPod stuck in her ears counting out steps.

Sunday, August 28

I can't believe some of the moves my body has learnt to do again. The last time I danced like this I was 18. It's making me feel alive being able to express the music through dance and push my body. Today we did a mini show - for all the divas, trustees, models. It has brought it home just how soon it all is. We need more work before we get on the stage for opening night.

Sunday, September 4

We tried on our outfits today. The clothes definitely helped me to think about my character. Rehearsal was for seven hours. Such dedication, but I know it will be worth it. Have been sick during the week, so have had a reality check: I need to look after myself better. Spent Saturday cooking meals and freezing them for the next two weeks' fuel supply. Poached eggs on rye bread with hollandaise sauce is becoming a little too predicable for my palette.

Saturday, September 10

Three days to go until opening night. I never want this journey to end, I've loved it so much. My daughter learns French and has been teaching me some of the pronunciation. She told me my French sucked. Wish me luck on that one.

Wednesday, September 14

This is it, all the hard work, the long rehearsal hours ... running through my mind are dance routines, can't forget the words in the songs. I am so proud of myself and all the fantastic women who have given so much of their time, and the support of their families. Well, this is it, we're on. Let's break a leg, of course not literally!

I felt so calm and focused while getting make-up and hair done. They did a great job.

Hitting that stage was electric. Wow, what a fantastic audience. I had a quote embedded in my mind - Life is an occasion, rise to it.

I also went on stage with my daughter's words in my mind - "I love you mum and I know you will be amazing, have fun!"

When I got home I enjoyed a glass of red wine, reflecting back on the night, feeling so proud, of myself and all the amazing people involved who have worked so hard. What a wonderful result.