Describing herself as a "highly functioning" alcoholic, mother-of-three Dann says that she was not a messy drunk despite regularly drinking up to a bottle of wine a night.
"There were no real dramas. I found myself reaching for the headache tablets each morning.
"Hanging out for the evening to open wine. A few times I went out and was talking to someone and I realised I was slurring. I was starting to get sloppier, I was going out and getting too opinionated. I didn't like the person I was becoming with wine."
Her lightbulb moment came when she found herself hiding an empty bottle of wine from her husband and opening another as though it was the first.
Now sober for almost four years, Dann said she had to retrain her brain. "I tried to moderate. I had long dry periods. But cutting down was not an option. I couldn't control alcohol, I would say I would have one glass and I would have five."
After deciding to stop drinking, she started the anonymous blog, Mrs D is Going Without, which is also the title of her memoir.
Dann now has a part-time job moderating the website LivingSober.org.nz, which started last August.
Dann is in Tauranga next week as guest speaker at the Legacy Lunch for The 200 Club, a fundraising club to help the local Tauranga Breast Cancer Support Organisation in its work. The club was inspired by the fact in the Bay of Plenty alone, more than 200 women are diagnosed with breast cancer each year.
Breast Cancer Support Service Trust Tauranga is calling locals to join the support club by donating $200. Proceeds of all fundraising stay in the community which stretches from Waihi to Maketu. The trust helps support newly-diagnosed patients and offer support by those who have been in the same situation.
Service manager at Breast Cancer Support Service Trust Tauranga Lea Lehndorf said members do not have to be breast cancer survivors or diagnosed with breast cancer - they can be - but the idea of the club is to get all the community together for a common good, she said.
I had started the blog to keep herself honest, using words and getting it out. But going public was scary.
Women who received support recovered better. "It's a whole community that is diagnosed, so we really believe in getting the community getting together.
Plus the lunch gives you the opportunity to network with other members, to hear a bit about where the money goes and receive inspiration from a speaker."
Dann said she is looking forward to sharing her journey in Tauranga. "I love being sober. I love the physical sensation and I also like the fact that I now feel things - good and bad.
I didn't realise until I stopped drinking how much it pushes painful emotions aside. I did not know that until I took alcohol away."
Dann says she is more fulfilled than ever with her work helping others with their own sober journeys. "I was hardwired to believe nothing was fun without alcohol. Now I love going out and talking to people and making sense. Remembering the next day."
It is not all easy as Dann writes herself in a recent blog, she has moments where she feels sad she can't enjoy a glass of wine, but uses the blog to support herself. " ... Because this is what this blog is for. For me to work my grey matter to fight my bull**** thinking that might try to ever tempt me back to that bull**** booze."
Living Sober support network
www.livingsober.org.nz
http://livingwithoutalcohol. blogspot.co.nz
(Lotta Dann's blog)
the fine print
What: Lotta Dann is guest speaker at the 200 Club Legacy Lunch for Tauranga Breast Cancer Support
When: Friday August 7
Where: ASB Baypark
www.the200club.co.nz
