Stories making headlines across New Zealand this morning include a Miss Tui finalist who is keeping the hopes of the Wairarapa alive, mystery packages from Paris that are full of cash and electricals, and dozens of horses that are at risk of ending up in dogbowls very soon.
The chainsaw weilding woman in hotpants from the Wairarapa has failed to make the final eight of the Miss Tui 2012 competition, but Vicky Paine from Masterton, who likes to wear jeans cut back so far the pockets show, is keeping the regions hopes and dreams alive. "You see the Tui girls on TV and they're very inspirational," she said. Yea Really!
Over on the Farside Farm in Norsewood a burglar ran for his life after jumping the fence into the middle of a posse of angry geese who immediately yelled "gobble, gobble, scream, scream" which apparently can terrify the most hardened of criminals.
Mysterious packages from Paris full of cash and other things have been showing up in West Coasters letterboxes and police want to hear from anyone else who has been getting such mail.
The first mountain in the country has been registered with the New Zealand Historic Places Trust.
In response to Hawke's Bay's very stagnant economy, Finance Bill English said "You have to do some things - you can't just sit there doing nothing." Fracking may help the economy but many locals are standing up to oppose it, this weekend waving placards at the National Party conference in Napier.
Here's your once in a lifetime chance to own a piece of New Zealand Maritime history, with suggested uses including a maimai, houseboat, playground attraction or a disaster evacuation pod.
In Papamoa, Tigger the cat has died of gun shot wounds, while a new threat has emerged with four cats dying and a fifth requiring a blood transfusion in the suburb.
Lois Ross arrived at work in Wanganui to find mystery bullet holes in her cake shop window.
Dozens of these horses are going to be dog meat if nobody takes them in.
Meanwhile Mount Maunganui pyschologist Lynne Dara said worrying was a natural trait for 21st century mothers.
Do you know this guy?
Over in Gisborne they are battling Third World disease and demolishing church's and the unemployment rate is 9.9 percent,
Lori Paul slipped out to buy milk in the middle of the night and was only away from her laptop for a few minutes.
What might Anders Breivik, the Christchurch Cathedral, and the Taleban have in common?
A new group is hoping to change kiwi culture so "it won't be so normal to be obliterated at 3am in the weekends."
In Wairarapa, some people are having to put their houses on the market to keep up with child support payments.
Cyclists in Christchurch are upset. Over in Akaroa there are fears the delightful little town could become a drug smugglers paradise.
Dunedin's airport runway is too short for some of the the world's top bands such as Coldplay, which apparently could be the reason why none of them will play in the city.
At the Oamaru Penguin Club's recent annual general meeting it was out with the old and in with the new. Meanwhile rustlers are at work in the region.
Top tending topics on Twitter in New Zealand at noon were: #REDvCHI, #ThingsIwantTheMost, #LiamFollowsDirectioners, Joey Barton, QPR, Slumdog Millionaire, Happy Mothers Day, Man City, Reds, Kahui