WE'VE talked about the principles and ideals of marriage, and much of it is personal opinion. Whether marriage is legal or de facto, it calls for commitment, but statistics are not good. First, however, the matter of status - are you married or not - and the interesting consequences?
You may be quite open and deliberate about it - a decision, or even a public declaration, of love and mutual commitment - an engagement, which is good. Domestic relationships begin in all sorts of ways, and often the law has to decide whether it is or not.
While you are together, you cease to be eligible for single welfare benefits. When it ends, and even the best will eventually end in death, the law may need to know whether or not you were married, or in actual relationship.
The Property (Relationships) Act, formerly the Matrimonial Property Act, declares in essence that whatever either of you owns in the way of home and furniture, vehicles and business etc, which you use together for purposes of the household, are deemed (that legal word) to be owned by both of you jointly. Most simply (after not less than three years), if you break up, you may claim half each. Then, or to establish inheritance, it may be critical not only to prove such a relationship, but also when it began. At that stage one who owned the home or business may be at pains to say that you were never married, and without a marriage certificate it is a real question. The law tries to help. There are certain criteria: do you share a home and a bed, and who owns them - and how many days or nights a week? Do you share a bank account, and the shopping and household chores? Do you travel or go on holiday together? Do you have children or share each others'?
You need to consider what you're doing and do it carefully. If you just slip into a wonderful relationship, and then things change after three years or more, section 21 of the act takes over and it's half his and half hers. No matter that you owned the property, or that you have worked tirelessly and paid all the bills, there's a presumption of equal sharing - and either may claim. It's the same with or without a will. The law makes practically no distinction between formal and informal marriage. When you marry you need to make a new will and, when it ends, you need to make it again - but (and it's a big one) the act still may trump the will - or rules of intestacy. Marriage is great when you stick to it, but if you don't it's hazardous.