Bin day is triggering for Narissa Wylie. She is anxious she might catch a glimpse of the neighbour who accidentally ran over her daughter, Terase.
On a sunny afternoon on October 3, Terase, 6, was in the driveway of her Tuakau home showing her mother new tricks on her electric scooter. Wylie, 40, gave her baby girl a big hug and a kiss and started washing her car while keeping an eye on her.
The mother of three claims she saw a vehicle reversing quickly down the shared driveway. Then, in a flash, her entire world crashed.
“I heard my daughter screaming, ‘Owwwww...’. I saw everything, Terase was killed in front of me,” Wylie said.
“The vehicle was reversing down the driveway and I wondered why it didn’t slow down. She was run over twice. My whole world dropped. It is the worst feeling in the world to have everything taken away from you in a second. I realised Terase had gone when I picked her up, she was lifeless.”
Wylie carried her inside to her bedroom and gave her CPR. A neighbour across the road called 111 because Wylie’s phone was covered in blood. Terase was unable to be revived.
In her first interview, the grieving mother is speaking publicly to raise awareness about driveway safety. About five children are killed in driveways a year in New Zealand.
Wylie is appealing for drivers to slow down and to look at their rear-vision mirrors.
With high-density housing and lots of children in the neighbourhood playing in driveways, the mother is also advocating for speed bumps and “slow down” signs in shared driveways.
A few weeks after Terase died, Wylie wrote a message on her wooden fence cautioning drivers: “Drive Slow for Our Kids. Terase our little Girl.”
“These driveway deaths are happening way too often and it’s devastating,” she says.
“Even though my child was in front of me, there should be speed bumps and signs to slow down especially when reversing. I don’t want anyone to have to go through what we have — even the driver who has a child.”
Wylie says Terase was beautiful, happy, and caring.
“Every day I’d wake her up and say, ‘Hello my baby’, and she would open those big, blue, beautiful eyes and have a huge smile on her face.”
The Year 2 pupil attended Tuakau Primary School and was much loved by her teachers and school friends.
Following the death, Safekids this week held a driveway awareness campaign at the local library to teach children how to be safe.
Wylie says Terase liked to paint, do crafts and always had projects on the go. The petite girl with long dark hair walked on her tiptoes like a ballerina and loved dancing in front of the television. One of her favourite dances was the one done by the titular character in the Netflix series Wednesday to The Cramps’ Goo Goo Muck.
After the accident, Wylie says she has nightmares and has developed anxiety and ticks. She says there is darkness at home.
“It has been hard on our family; we are lost without our little girl. It is quiet at home and feels dark. It is difficult for me, I used to spend so much time with her. The memories of Terase in the house like photos and videos are comforting but outside the house — the driveway is triggering. So is Farmers, I took her there to pick out Christmas presents and toys — she wanted everything.”
Wylie says Stephen, her “beautiful” husband who is her rock, is “hurting”. The tunnel manager and Terase had a daily ritual playing hide and seek together.
She says she is not ready to forgive the driver who killed her daughter. They have never met and have had no contact since the accident.
“I am sorry the driver is going through this sadness as well. I can’t forgive them, my daughter is dead. But I don’t wish this upon them. I will never wish this on their little boy getting hurt or any member of their family. But I don’t want to know them, out of sight and out of mind.”
A police spokesperson said the investigation was ongoing and no charges had been laid.
One regret Wylie has is washing her car that day instead of taking Terase to feed the ducks, something they did together regularly.
“There are a lot of things I wish I did differently. The car is not as important as a child. Don’t take life for granted, something beautiful can be taken away — just like that. Things like cleaning can wait. Spend time and play with your children and hug them always. I miss Terase saying to me,’You are the best mummy, I love you’.”
Carolyne Meng-Yee is an Auckland-based investigative journalist. She has worked for the Herald since 2007 and was previously a commissioner at TVNZ and a current affairs producer for 60 minutes, 20/20 and Sunday.
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Source: Safekids