That he survived to tell the stories, he says, is thanks to the helicopter rescue services.
The most perilous of his adventures was a mid-winter mishap on the farm, when his four-wheeler tipped over.
It was about 1.10pm and his wife, Christine, was at work.
Suffering 10 broken ribs, he knew he'd have to wait for help, but it was well after dark when a neighbour found him after a search was launched. It was after 9.30pm that a rescue helicopter arrived from Palmerston North, and, with hypothermia setting in and having almost "given up the fight", he was flown, unconscious, back over the ranges, where he regained consciousness in a sea of white-coated people.
The pilot was Square Trust rescue service pilot Chris Moody. They'd seen each other before, when Beetham was lifted off Mt Ruapehu with the femur fractures that kept him in hospital for about 10 days.
Out of the hazy memories of the farm accident episode - "which was very close" - he recalls Moody lamenting: "It's a very expensive way of clocking up airpoints."
Beetham snr spent a lot of time rescuing people in remote areas during 28 years as a rural volunteer fireman, and says before helicopter services were introduced, many injured or seriously ill people had died before help was able to arrive.
"The helicopters are a marvel," he says.
It costs about $2.2 million to run the service in Hawke's Bay, with half needed from sponsors and public donations, says trust marketing and fundraising manager Louise Harvey.