Book review: Two things the Brits do well are making enemies and laughing at themselves. Both talents are showcased in Terry Deary’s A History of Britain in Ten Enemies.
This is basically a “Horrible Histories” for grown-ups. Deary is the brains behind those hugely successful books, credited with making history fun (Botched beheadings! Lifting the lid on Tudor toilets!) for millions of kids. As you’d expect, this is a rollicking romp, written mostly to entertain, but it’s also an excellent resource. Is your child studying Western history at school? They could well learn more from this than their required reading list.
Deary uses Britain’s conflicts as a device through which to explore the evolution of its nationhood: “We are defined not by our friends but by our enemies.” He makes the point that if we don’t learn from history, we’re doomed to repeat our mistakes. He also shows us the absurdities (“our ancestors were often surprisingly silly”) and how history can be determined by random twists of fate.
Nothing unites a country like war with another country, but Deary emphasises the difference between patriotism and nationalism, quoting the French leader Charles de Gaulle: “Patriotism is when love of your own people comes first; nationalism, when hate for people other than your own comes first.”
The “enemies” are: Italy, Saxony, Scandinavia, France, Spain, the Dutch Empire, United States, Russia, Ireland and Germany. The first four were invaders, then halfway through “France”, things head offshore. From the 14th century, the main action was overseas (or on the sea).
Britain’s response to the Romans is an early example of how a common enemy can unite warring factions. Boudica, that fearsome warrior queen, persuaded Britannia’s tribes to set aside their differences and join her in attempting to drive out the common enemy. Sadly, she failed. During the Roman occupation, Britannia converted to Christianity, and the eventual split into Catholicism and Protestantism would be responsible for many conflicts to come (see “Ireland”).
Next came the Saxons, who established seven kingdoms (“coming over here, naming our counties”). They were followed by the Scandinavians (the “pillagers of villagers”). This chapter demonstrates how history is constantly being rewritten. To the Victorians, the Vikings were bloodthirsty raiders, but by the 21st century they were “loveable farmers and settlers”.
Britain’s early enemies eventually became assimilated. A 2016 Daily Telegraph survey calculated that the average British resident is 36.94% Anglo-Saxon, 21.59% Celtic and 19.91% Western European. Another 9.2% is originally from Scandinavia.
In “France”, Deary ponders Britain’s deep-seated mistrust of their neighbours across the Channel. “Nations have long memories. The Saxons were all but enslaved [by the Normans] and it seems they never forgave nor forgot.”
But “nothing brings peace with an old enemy like a confrontation with a new enemy”. During the 20th century, Britain became France’s greatest ally, and eventually they were part of the same political union. Briefly.
Conflict with the Dutch and Spanish was all about the high seas – trade wars, piracy, land and slavery. War with Spain included that seminal event, the Spanish Armada (1588). King Philip II collected lands “like a trainspotter, and turned his ships’ guns on England to complete the set”. He lost mostly because of the weather.
British, Spanish and Dutch trade “relied on invasion, colonialism and robbing the natives”, and Deary describes the Anglo-Dutch wars as “baddies versus baddies”.
The chapter on the United States is short; there was only the one major war, which followed the declaration of independence. Deary explores the “special relationship”, noting that after WWII the Marshall Plan left many countries in debt to the US, “and no one wants to upset their bank manager”.
Apart from the nasty blip of the Crimean War, Russia and Britain rubbed along for centuries, bonded by monarchy. Then came the great shifts in power and ideology in Europe: “Communism levelled the playing field. Now, everyone was a peasant. That’s levelling up for you.” In 1945, the Iron Curtain descended and the Cold War began. Mistrust of Russia banded Britain and its allies together like never before.
Closer to home, conflict in Ireland began in 1171, when Henry II imposed English rule. For centuries, the Irish persisted in rebelling, and eventually, to tip the balance against the Catholics, Elizabeth I’s government gave large areas of the north to Scottish Protestant immigrants. “As Liz may have said, ‘It seemed like a good idea at the time.’”
Deary writes, “As religious zeal has diminished, so have the hatreds. The Protestant priest Ian Paisley said in 1997, ‘I will never sit down with [Irish Republican] Gerry Adams.’ In 2007 they announced the formation of a power-sharing government. Even the oldest hatreds can end in time.”
The final chapter begins, “Be honest: when I said ‘Britain’s enemy’, who did you think of?” Conflict with Germany united Britain in a way no enemy ever had before, and we see in Britain’s responses the culmination of all those centuries of developing nationhood. Deary concludes: “From Saxons to Nazis … the Germanic people have helped shape Britannia.”
What we learn is that for everyone, the real enemies aren’t other nations, they’re tyranny, oppression, nationalism, extremism, greed, ideology, ignorance – and, especially, men with very big egos. This book is therefore perhaps as much an exploration of the idea of “the enemy” as it is a history of Britain.
