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Home / Northland Age

Obituary: Passionate teacher William Tailby had empathy for students

Northland Age
29 May, 2018 01:30 AM5 mins to read

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William Ernest Tailby.

William Ernest Tailby.

William Ernest Tailby, who died suddenly on May 20, will be remembered as a passionate teacher who had an innate understanding of and empathy for his students, as a member of a highly respected Kaitaia family, as a loving son, husband, father and grandfather.

His sister Joanne would remember him for all those reasons and more, son Mathew told last week's funeral congregation — and as the most wonderful big brother.

Joanne, he said, had told him that William had gone out of his way to look out for and protect his little sister. As a young boy he had asked his mother to teach him to sew, so he could make dolls' clothes as a birthday present for her.

'By all accounts this sandal-wearing local hippie boy with a questionable sense of humour was well regarded by those early students.'

Matthew, son

"I liked this story, because it highlights some of the traits that I loved about my Dad, his caring and thoughtful nature, and that he could do or make pretty much anything he put his mind to," he said.

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The stories he told of his childhood (as the oldest son of Phyllis and the late Ian Tailby) were of a loving home that gave him the confidence to go out and find friends and adventures, whether it was biking to Ahipara to find and cook tuatua on an old piece of iron on the beach or running riot with the Vegar St boys.

He met his soulmate, Elizabeth, at Auckland University, or more precisely at an orientation toga party. Elizabeth had thought that perhaps he would not remember her, but he tracked her down the very next day, and they spent the rest of their university years together.

Mathew had become part of the family by the time his parents returned to Kaitaia, his father taking up a teaching position at his old school.

"By all accounts this sandal-wearing local hippie boy with a questionable sense of humour was well regarded by those early students," he said.

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"A lot of time around this period was spent at Elizabeth's family's farm at Diggers' Valley. William, along with Stephan and Elizabeth, established a huge garden there, a practice William maintained to this day."

There were shearing and docking days too, William and his brothers-in-law trotting out the same bad jokes every year as they strived to have the last word in bad puns. William's favourite joke involved a fire in a French cheese factory, which left only 'de bries'.

Meanwhile, a visit to China with brother Jonathan and sister-in-law Char'lien kindled a passion for bargaining, "and so was born the Trade Me addiction, leading to successful bidding on two bikes at once, an ever-growing pocket knife collection and many more surprises yet to arrive in the mail".

"William certainly packed each day to its fullest, managing a school, a large family, his bees, trees, vineyard and garden, and all those lawns," Mathew added.

"He was very giving, sharing the produce of these hobbies, even if the wine was not as widely acclaimed as the honey, olive oil and home brew.

"He was also generous with his time, helping others with their construction projects, coaching sports teams and working as a JP, to name but a few of these things. He always made time to coach us through life's tougher decisions, not giving us the answer but giving us the tools to work it out for ourselves.

"I recall asking him before a significant birthday what he would like more than anything, and he told me he'd like an awesome whanau. I have to think he got what he asked for, but had to create it himself, albeit with a significant contribution from Elizabeth.

"I take it as a measure of the man that he instilled in his children values and a worth ethic without telling us how to live our lives," he added. "How we treated people was more important to him than what we were doing. That said, he was proud of the accomplishments of his children and mokopuna.

"He was passionate about educational opportunities for everyone, and believed a rural school could prepare people as well, if not better, for life than a flash private school. He strove to make this a reality, in part by working to address teacher shortages from within his own family."

In preparing his father's eulogy, he said he had had to stop and think about who William was, not just to his son as a constant supporting presence but to the wider community, which had been a huge part of his life, through which he had touched so many lives.

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Others spoke too of the lives William Tailby had touched, for the better, and the lasting impact he had had on the community where he was born, grew up, and served so well for so many years.

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