Northland Age
  • Northland Age home
  • Latest news
  • Sport
  • Rural
  • Opinion
  • Kaitaia weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • Sport
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology

Locations

  • Far North
  • Kaitaia
  • Kaikohe
  • Bay of Islands
  • Whangārei

Weather

  • Kaitaia
  • Whangārei
  • Dargaville

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Northland Age

Father's emotional Ngawha Prison admission - 'I failed my son'

Northland Age
2 Jul, 2018 08:00 PM3 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

The Northland Regional Corrections Facility's 'Whare' Graduation last Friday.

The Northland Regional Corrections Facility's 'Whare' Graduation last Friday.

A remorseful father made an emotional confession to failing his son, at a 'Whare' Graduation ceremony at Ngawha Prison.

The ceremony was for the young graduates of a programme aimed at reducing their potential to re-offend.

The father said he'd had a "who cares?" attitude.

''People were walking in and out of the house with stolen stuff, stuff that wasn't ours," he said.

"We didn't realise the effect we were having on him at that stage. We were teaching him not to value stuff, and stuff like 'Who cares about respect [for] other people?' What we instilled in our boy was if they're not [our family] then f*** them.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

He said there were none of these programmes to stop reoffending back then.

"Then we started having other kids, a daughter, another son, another daughter, another daughter.

"Then one day we realised what we were doing was not right for them and their children, so I decided, me and my missus, that we needed to change our ways,'' the repentant father said.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
An emotional moment for a father and son at Ngawha prison. Photo / Debbie Beadle
An emotional moment for a father and son at Ngawha prison. Photo / Debbie Beadle

''What we were doing was affecting our kids, we watched other families around us; the teenagers were doing drugs and [killing] themselves because they had no mechanisms to help themselves and how to deal with life.

"The way I see it, it's the parents' fault with all these young ones going off the rails. They need to be the ones supporting the young ones going through life ...

"So we decided to change our parenting. Unfortunately, it was too late for my oldest boy. We had already instilled in him the bad ways - we instilled 16 years of it into him - but it was not too late for the others.''

He said when they did change their parenting, the other children were okay.

''But this guy, my son, had a hard job of adjusting to the new regime.

"I achieved my goals but I forgot about my son ... I left him to his own devices.

"Because I did that to my son it is only right that I be standing here in front of you to tautoko, to support him,'' the man said.

"My missus gave me a list of things that she wanted me to do.

"Top of the list was for me to get a job, and get off the WINZ [benefit]. I used to worry whether the brothers would respect me after I changed my ways and got a job or the new way I am.

"Now I don't care about that. At the end of the day I am here today to support my son, because we brought him up like that, and I love my son.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

"What the facilitators have done here in the way of aroha and empathy has been amazing.

"His grandparents also instilled that in him when I was in jail. I never instilled anything like that in him."

Where to get help:

• Lifeline: 0800 543 354 (available 24/7) • Suicide Crisis Helpline: 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) (available 24/7) • Youth services: (06) 3555 906 • Youthline: 0800 376 633 • Kidsline: 0800 543 754 (available 24/7) • Whatsup: 0800 942 8787 (1pm to 11pm) • The Word • Depression helpline: 0800 111 757 (available 24/7) •

Save

    Share this article

Latest from Northland Age

Northland Age

Blueprint for the future: Kerikeri's new strategic growth plan adopted

26 Jun 01:00 AM
Northland Age

'No benefit': Dentist challenges fluoride use in water debate

25 Jun 06:00 PM
Northland Age

Far North news briefs: NRC rates to increase, build your digital knowledge

25 Jun 05:00 PM

Kaibosh gets a clean-energy boost in the fight against food waste

sponsored
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from Northland Age

Blueprint for the future: Kerikeri's new strategic growth plan adopted

Blueprint for the future: Kerikeri's new strategic growth plan adopted

26 Jun 01:00 AM

The council adopted Te Pātukurea to guide growth in Kerikeri and Waipapa.

'No benefit': Dentist challenges fluoride use in water debate

'No benefit': Dentist challenges fluoride use in water debate

25 Jun 06:00 PM
Far North news briefs: NRC rates to increase, build your digital knowledge

Far North news briefs: NRC rates to increase, build your digital knowledge

25 Jun 05:00 PM
'A sadistic flavour': Paedophile's jail time extended after more predatory offending revealed

'A sadistic flavour': Paedophile's jail time extended after more predatory offending revealed

25 Jun 07:00 AM
Engage and explore one of the most remote places on Earth in comfort and style
sponsored

Engage and explore one of the most remote places on Earth in comfort and style

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • The Northland Age e-edition
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Subscribe to The Northland Age
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The Northland Age
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP