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Home / Northern Advocate

Kevin Page: Easter means chocolate and hot cross buns, right - but what about Jesus?

By Kevin Page
Northern Advocate·
3 Apr, 2018 02:00 AM4 mins to read

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Does Easter mean more than chocolate, wonders ''Northern Advocate'' columnist Kevin Page. Photo / Getty Images

Does Easter mean more than chocolate, wonders ''Northern Advocate'' columnist Kevin Page. Photo / Getty Images

As luck would have it, Mrs P had a friend call round the other day with her young son.

And, as happens with such things, I found myself chatting on the front porch with Master Seven while the girls discussed the current economic situation and the never-ending search for world peace.

OK, I'm joking. They sat inside and talked about shopping.

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Now obviously they would be in deep, breathless discussion over things like the right boots for winter (tall, short, high-heeled, flat, brown, black etc etc) and whether another pair of black pants (apparently you can never have enough) should be purchased, so me and the little chap grabbed the mini football we keep handy for such occasions and went and did man stuff.

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After 20 minutes of passing the object back and forward, my mate got bored – probably with the irony of me trying to show him how to spin pass like an All Black halfback and sending the ball flying out over the fence. Twice – so we retired to the two cans of fizzy I'd previously plonked on the seat on the porch.

Now this is where the luck bit comes in.

I'd been discussing the meaning of Easter with some mates over a few quiets a few nights previously. Up 'til that subject emerged it had been all work, football, money, golf etc etc. then someone mentioned Easter and away we went.

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My mates and I are of an age where it makes the brain throb if we talk too much about serious stuff so it wasn't a full-out, in-depth debate but the suggestion was made that kids these days don't know the reason for the holiday they've suddenly got.

So, to cut a long story short, I thought since this opportunity had arisen I'd ask Master Seven if he knew what Easter was about.

Expecting at least some mention of Jesus or God in the reply I was somewhat surprised with the one sentence I did get.

"You get lots of Easter eggs," he said excitedly.

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Hmm. So basically Easter to him was about chocolate.

OK, I thought. Maybe he's too young. Maybe his parents have decided not to mention religion or stuff like that in their home. Maybe they've decided to let him make his own mind up.

But then I thought well he's bound to have picked up some stuff from his older brother and sister. Surely he'll know who Jesus is. So I pushed it a bit.

I was right. Obviously he'd picked up little bit and pieces here and there and had taken in parts of some of the Jesus stories.

Which is actually a lot like me I think.

I remember sitting cross-legged on the hall floor at my school in London as a little tacker back in the day when ''religious education'' was part of the game and each assembly finished with one of the teachers telling you a tale about Jesus.

My favourite was always Mr Brooks who, by the look of him was at least 147, and, for some inexplicable reason, did a hand-stand and told the last five minutes of his story upside down.

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Maybe that's why I remember the tale. It was the one where all these people turned up to hear Jesus speak and there were only, like, six loaves of bread and a couple of fish for tea.

Obviously this was in the days before pizza deliveries so the gathered masses had to make do with Jesus working a miracle and suddenly turning the six loaves and fish into enough for everyone.

Anyway.

So here I am sitting on the porch and I'm relaying this story to Master Seven, complete with the bit about Mr Brooks standing on his head which I thought he'd find most interesting.

Apparently not.

As I attempted to show him how men crushed their empty fizzy drink cans in one hand he wondered if Jesus could do that with loaves and fishes perhaps he could turn one Easter egg into lots so everyone in the world could have some.

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I know, right. Awwww.

So it seems to me innocence and compassion still exist in this crazy world and it is to be rejoiced.

As is Easter. And chocolate.

■ Kevin Page is a teller of tall tales with a firm belief too much serious news gives you frown lines. Feel free to share stories to kevin.page@nzme.co.nz .

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