Joanne McNeill: Prophetic tidings of March

Lusi was no fizzer.

Even supported by unprecedented 21st century information technology, prophecy remains fraught with unknown variables.

Anyway, is it best to know in advance so preparations can be made to mitigate looming disasters, or is it better to stay blissfully ignorant?

There's a fine line between sensible preparations and creating trouble by visualising it if the existentialist notion that we're making up reality as we go along is credible.

Nevertheless, lately, via the amazing fingertip interweb, it's possible to sample a vast range of free daily astrological predictions idly over breakfast then later, with hindsight (arguably no more reliable than foresight because of the vagaries of memory and subjectivity), assess their relative accuracy.

Mostly they're way off beam, which is good because when invariably no promised delightful lovers or glittering successes eventuate, it's a fair bet prognosticated dooms won't either ... although one can never be sure.

For instance, last Wednesday, terrifyingly, one astrologer advised.

There's a strong wave of power coming your way. Be careful how you handle it. You're extra prone to injuries and accidents of an explosive nature. Try not to make any hasty moves when driving and be careful operating things like gas pumps or propane tanks.

Fortunately I never handle propane, even on a good day. Hasty moves are not in my repertoire either (long slow consideration following extensive research is my preferred custom) but driving and fuel pumps were unavoidably on the list.

However, having driven extra quakingly, and filled up with petrol without blowing up the local service station, I set off to town relatively confident the forecast was piffle.

Next stop the hardware store for a big bag of potting mix. No worries there ... sealed potting mix is not notably volatile. I trolleyed it to the ute where, because heavy bags are hernia territory, I was grateful when a passing kind gentleman offered to lift it on board.

Afterwards though, while I was intent upon hooking up the ute cover, a sudden shout and a freeze-framed, horrified glance revealed a valiant woman in hot pursuit of my trolley which, unbeknown to me, had sneakily broken loose and was free-wheeling downhill at a gathering rate of knots towards a row of shiny parked cars. Yikes!

Without thinking I exploded into a totally unprecedented burst of speed and remarkably actually halted the trolley before any expensive panel-beating could result.

Later, reflecting ruefully on the astrological prediction (and on the pain from whatever pulled in my hip during the unaccustomed exercise) it was clear how the planetary aspects that made the astrologer warn against hasty moves and explosive power could just as easily manifest in a sudden sprint as in a flaming inferno.

Weather forecasting has a similar hit rate.

Cyclone Lusi was no fizzer and we are grateful ... both for the full water-tank at last and that it was not more damaging ... but for anyone who actually remembers the devastating pre-digital Wahine storm or Cyclone Bola, last week's hysterical level of premature meteorological media panic was further proof that while weather is no worse than ever, the human tendency to catastrophise wildly has multiplied with the growth of information technology ... and the deadliest disasters are still the ones you don't see coming.