Have your say: Singer's proviso

Chris Brown.

The debate over whether entertainer Chris Brown is allowed into the country is a good thing, in that it focuses attention on the appalling amount of domestic violence in New Zealand.
And if he is to be allowed in, then he must clearly communicate that he understands and accepts the reality of his situation.

And this harsh reality applies to all men who have perpetrated domestic violence against women and children.

There is no excuse for domestic violence.

The perpetrator must in the first instance fully accept this bottom line fact, and consequently fully take responsibility for what he has done.

The equation does not go, "I'm sorry it was all my fault, now it's your turn to forgive me, and we can go back to happy families".

For men like Mr Brown, the truth is inescapable, they have no alternative than to absolutely accept their responsibility and also go forward in their lives with the knowledge any forgiveness they are shown is a sovereign gift, and never something that can be expected.

Getting counselling, going to rehab, finding God, becoming enlightened, can all look good on the surface, but if in the end it translates to, "I'm a good boy now - so come on gimme a break", well tough, it does not wash.

If you, Chris Brown, can clearly express these inescapable truths to nga rangitara, the youth, it will be worth allowing you in, with the proviso that you do indeed articulate the reality of what it is to be an abuser. Do it, Chris, go on to a marae or two, and give the korero, in concert make a point of talking about it to the audience.

But if you simply pop along snapping your fingers and doing the moves and bustin' the rhymes, and coining it big - with a passing nod here and a gesture there to bad times with Rihanna - sorry mate, go somewhere else to turn a buck.

Naku noa na

GM Tinker
RD5, Whangarei

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