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Home / Bay of Plenty Times

Richard Moore: Forget Coro, John

Bay of Plenty Times
3 Oct, 2011 07:19 PM4 mins to read

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It is election year and I am pleased - and relieved - that Prime Minister John Key has got his eyes firmly on the ball.

With the poll only weeks away it would be all too easy for Key to opt for populist policies and messages rather than tackle serious issues such as the economy, debt levels and how to get this country out of the financial mire it is in.

Good old John, leading with courage.

On a day where two international credit agencies downgraded New Zealand's creditworthiness, Key jumps straight in to deal with pressing issues.

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Yup, he backed those people opposing TVNZ's moving of Coronation Street from 7.30pm to 5.30pm!

As a person who physically cringes if I haven't changed the channel before those mournful tones of that stupid British tripe come on I was gobsmacked that a Prime Minister would care.

Now let's put this into perspective. The ratings downgrades - by Fitch and Standard and Poor's - are likely to lead to a jump in mortgage rates and finance becoming more expensive because New Zealand borrowing is deemed more risky than it was before.

That means the cost of living for people here will rise.

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But it clearly wasn't as important to the PM as TVNZ shifting that garbage television soap.

Good grief.

AS AN ever-flowing font of helpful suggestions to our city burghers I reckon I have come up with a winner to help solve Tauranga's debt crisis.

Council should pass a bylaw banning saggy pants.

You know the horrendous fashion statement by many young people that has their undies showing as their pants fall under their backsides. Aside from the risk of spotting holes in said undergarments, it makes the youths' legs look one foot long and makes them walk in a very silly way.

In Albany, Georgia - that's in the US of A, the local council has collected more than $5000 since it banned saggy duds nine months ago.

The rule is that if your pants or skirt sit more than 7.62 centimetres below the top of the hips, thus exposing skin or underwear, you cop a US$20 ($26) fine. That's for the first offence. If you continue to be a fashion retard you can be clobbered with a US$200 penalty.

Now, unfortunately, violators cannot be jailed, but the council could allow for community service in lieu of a fine.

If council adopts the policy, it could mean an end to rates rises.

BY CRIKEY it seems the powers that be in city hall are a tad sensitive about the media.

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In a recent letter to the Times editor, someone asked about councillors' meeting attendance record and so I thought it would be an idea to follow it up and see if there were any interesting stats.

I called the Clown Hall and inquired if I could have those details. It duly arrived via email.

Funny thing is that it appears a council officer quickly passed on my inquiry to at least one elected official. Ooooh, they must have been all a flutter, clearly reading more into a simple request for information as something serious to be headed off at the pass.

A senior senior senior councillor took umbrage at my citizen's right to ask questions of public officials and rambled on at length about a beat-up on the way and so he broke the story himself. Only there was no story. And I do so wish he'd understand the difference between reporters and columnists too ... it is so annoying.

Anyway to the council officer I want to know: "Y Tattle?"

WHEN I was a photographic student some of the most nervous times I had were when doing studio sessions with nude models.

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Lucky me, you may think, but keeping your concentration while focusing on a naked female form is a lot harder than you would expect. Unless you are Robert Mapplethorpe, of course. But, my experiences were far better than a French chappie who was shooting soft porn on top of a freight train.

I know, that does raise some very interesting mental images, but it was a bit shocking for the Froggie. It seems he forgot that he was up high and near power lines as he ended up in hospital with major burns across 50 per cent of his body.

Talk about electricity between a model and the photographer.

WHAT a weekend of sport. My beloved Geelong won their third premiership in five years with a resounding win by 38 points over those horrid Collingwood Magpies. And last night my hometown Sea Eagles were left bruised, bloodied and victorious 24-10 over a gutsy Warriors. Now for the World Cup!!!!!

richard@richardmoore.com

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