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Home / New Zealand

Shame of the elders abandoned by family

Lincoln Tan
By Lincoln Tan
Multimedia Journalist·NZ Herald·
21 Sep, 2009 04:00 PM3 mins to read

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According to the New Zealand Census the number of people claiming to be Hindus has jumped 61.8 per cent since 2001. File photo / Brett Phibbs

According to the New Zealand Census the number of people claiming to be Hindus has jumped 61.8 per cent since 2001. File photo / Brett Phibbs

A 71-year-old Hindu-Indian says he has constantly thought of ending his life after his son and daughter-in-law moved to Australia with his 15-year-old grandson earlier this year.

Mr K Siva, a former street food hawker from Malaysia, thought he would get to live "the perfect life" when his son sponsored
his immigration to New Zealand.

But since moving here life for the widower has revolved around looking after and cooking for his grandson, who was 9 when he first arrived in Auckland six years ago.

The son's family moved to Australia in January, and that was the last time Mr Siva had seen or heard from them.

"How could they do such a thing to me ... I am totally shocked. It is so shameful," Mr Siva said.

"I can't even tell anyone what happened because it will just show that I have failed in raising my son correctly."

Auckland Hindu community leader Pravin Patel said some elderly Indian grandparents were being sponsored to become permanent residents in New Zealand by their children only to be used as nannies and babysitters - and were "practically abandoned" when their "services" were no longer needed.

Mr Patel said many were "severely depressed" but were too embarrassed and reluctant to seek help.

"Disrespecting our elders totally goes against the teachings of Hinduism or the Indian culture, but it is happening and it is absolutely shameful," said Mr Patel, 60, patron of the Hindu Elders Foundation.

"Our recent migrants do not mix with the well-settled Indian migrants, so life really becomes a struggle for them.

"They have no social circle and don't know the New Zealand system, and are suddenly forced to cope on their own.".

The Hindu Council of New Zealand is organising the Hindu elders conference next Saturday at the Hindu Heritage Centre in Mangere to address this and other issues facing elders.

Mr Patel said the conference will also discuss "positive ageing" of Hindu elders, and ways they can contribute their "wisdom and wealth of experience" to the wider New Zealand society.

He said many Hindu elders came from established professional, business and farming backgrounds, and it would be a waste if their talents were not tapped to help strengthen the fabric of New Zealand society.

"We want to empower them, so that they can live with confidence and be productive and participating citizens of their adopted country," he said.

National list MP Kanwaljit Singh Bakshi, who will be attending the conference, said he would be pushing for greater monitoring of issues facing Indian community elders.

"At the moment, there is a lack of monitoring on senior citizens in the Indian community and the problems they have. Without that, we don't even know what sort of assistance they need and what we can do to help them," he said.

Mr Bakshi, originally from India, says he didn't think the problem with elder abandonment was widespread because Indian culture and religions generally instil in children a sense of respect for their parents and elders.

Hinduism is the oldest and third largest religion in the world with more than a billion followers, and the faith is also one of the fastest growing religions in New Zealand.

According to the New Zealand Census, there are 64,392 people who claim to be Hindus in 2006, a 61.8 per cent jump from the previous Census in 2001.

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