Leaving a list of emergency contacts and instructions for the baby sitter is pretty standard. Telling the sitter to breastfeed your children on demand is not.
It's also unusual to advise the sitter to feed your kids unlimited amounts of sugar and plop them in front of the television for hours, but one parent did just that last week.
The unidentified mum left a long list of tips and rules for the person coming over to watch the children, filled with unusual advice that has the internet in stitches, reported the Daily Mail.
The list was shared on Twitter this weekend by YouTuber @malikbrazile, who said his girlfriend encountered the odd instructions at work.
On a sheet of lined paper, the mother wrote out ten "rules & tips", which were all likely meant to be jokes.
"I encourage the kids to watch as much TV as possible, so they will leave me the hell alone," she wrote. "Feel free to do the same."
She advised not to "waste your valuable time cooking or providing healthy snacks", noting that pizza should be just fine.
"They do still breastfeed on demand," reads the third point. "Just download a video on YouTube. It's not hard or I wouldn't do it."
My girl went to go babysit and this is what the parents left herpic.twitter.com/BtL9BHdCMz— LEEK (@malikbrazile) April 20, 2017
This point struck the sitter and her boyfriend in particular, since Malik noted that the kids are "mad old".
The mother goes on to say not to take kittens, candy, or puppies from a man named David - who might be a neighbor - and not to get into his van.
As for the other neighbors, she went on, it was important to treat them like Jehovah's Witnesses if they came to the door.
"Don't lend them any eggs/milk/cigarettes. They know where the store is."
In the same vein as permitting unlimited TV, the note reads: "Let the kids have as much sugar as they want, as long as they will go away. They take pills to sleep anyway."
The mother also says it is ok for the sitter to have a boyfriend over, as long as he has a male relative for the mother to call later.
She adds not to answer the phone unless the sitter wants to pay the bills, and says that snooping is OK as long as the sitter cleans as she does it.
Finally, she writes: "Do not believe ANYTHING the kids tell you."
The list has already been liked 33,000 times on Twitter, and hundreds of people have commented on the funny idea.