It's unbelievable but we still live in a world where people have to apologise for their vagnas. Yes, their vagnas. And according to an Aussie magazine, Amy Schumer is leading the charge.
Thumbing through the latest edition of NW Magazine instead of doing actual work, I was in a terrific mood. I'd just finished an in-depth feature on the definitive history of Victoria Beckham's breasts titled "The highs and lows of Posh's puppies".
I pored over photos claiming to show Chris Hemsworth and Elsa Pataky in the midst of their "biggest fight yet". The article raised many questions - like why doesn't Elsa seem to own any shoes? And how does one person alone acquire so many pieces of clothing with leather fringe?
I started the celebrity crozzle and dog-eared the page to finish it later.
And then I began skimming a Q&A with the hilarious Amy Schumer about her new flick with Hollywood legend Goldie Hawn, Snatched.
What drew me in, though, was the matter-of-fact headline. In large pink and yellow letters spread across two pages were the words: "AMY SCHUMER: 'I'M SORRY I HAVE A VAGNA'.
I was confused. Mainly because "vagna" is what I call "vegetarian lasagne". My face resembled Amy's to the left of the unfortunate headline.
I don't have much to do with vaginas. In fact, this story is the most amount of time I've ever spent thinking about one. But I do know you can't spell one without an "I".
At first I thought the missing part was accidentally caught under a staple in the spine of the magazine - an uncomfortable predicament I wouldn't wish on even my worst enemy's vagina. But upon closer inspection, it was not.
"Vagina" has indeed been printed as "VAGNA" in size 40 font. It's the subediting equivalent of getting asked to read aloud from the textbook in Year 10 biology and accidentally mispronouncing "organism" as "orgasm".
I should point out, I'm totally not one to talk because I'm the worst when it comes to typos. There's probably five in this one story. And if you can find them all, I'll send you a picture of my vagna.