With the news of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's divorce today came the expected reactions to any surprise celebrity breakup.
Love is dead, we moaned. If these two can't make it, what hope do any of us have?
With this breakup, though, comes one ugly side-effect: Pitt's famous ex, Jennifer Aniston, gets dragged into the equation. Across the world, thousands of people searched 'JENNIFER ANISTON+PLEASED+GIF' for their wholly original social media posts. 'Jennifer Aniston' joined 'Brangelina' as one of the top trending terms on Twitter.
Jennifer Aniston, reading TMZ this morning: pic.twitter.com/iWr6IbNmZN— Andy Herren (@AndyHerren) September 20, 2016
... And so on, and so on.
Let's remind ourselves of a few facts here:
Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt were married for five years, announcing their divorce in 2005 - that's more than a decade ago.
After their marriage ended, Aniston had several more long-term relationships, dating Vince Vaughn and John Mayer among others.
Aniston started dating actor and director Justin Theroux in 2011. They got engaged and bought a home together the next year, and have now been married for more than a year. With no evidence to the contrary, we can only assume theirs is a happy union and Jen's not locking herself in the attic each night to rewatch Meet Joe Black and think about what might have been.
Even disregarding her personal life (which is, after all, personal - she's not a Kardashian-esque reality star, using her private life as currency), it's safe to say Jennifer Aniston has her own s**t going on, with a net worth of US $140 million thanks to her hugely successful film and television career.
Aniston herself has spoken out about this weird ownership that tabloids and celeb-watchers feel over her relationships, her happiness, even her body. After enduring years of speculation about her relationships - perhaps more so than any other actress of her generation - she penned a brutally honest essay for the Huffington Post earlier this year, its 900 words making one very clear point: 'STFU AND LEAVE ME ALONE.'
"If I am some kind of symbol to some people out there, then clearly I am an example of the lens through which we, as a society, view our mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, female friends and colleagues. The objectification and scrutiny we put women through is absurd and disturbing," she wrote.
"I used to tell myself that tabloids were like comic books, not to be taken seriously, just a soap opera for people to follow when they need a distraction. But I really can't tell myself that anymore because the reality is the stalking and objectification I've experienced first-hand, going on decades now, reflects the warped way we calculate a woman's worth."
With Pitt and Jolie's decade-long partnership coming to an end, leaving six children dealing with their parents' divorce, do we really think Jennifer Aniston is feeling pleased today? Like she 'won'? If so, where are the memes and gifs today showing Angelina Jolie's ex-husband, Billy Bob Thorton, celebrating the news?
Given what she wrote so recently, surely if Aniston's feeling anything, it's a sense of foreboding that this news will again drag her into the tabloid news cycle, linked once more to a man she split up with over a decade ago.