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Home / Entertainment

Sideswipe: September 18: Political toilet humour

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
17 Sep, 2015 05:00 PM3 mins to read

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The key for the bathroom at the Grey Lynn Library. (Via Alex Cragg)?

The key for the bathroom at the Grey Lynn Library. (Via Alex Cragg)?

Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

Keep your eyes on the road and the phone hands-free

"Pulled on to Great South Rd, Takanini heading to the Southern Motorway to work this morning at 6.45," write Mihi. "I pass the next street on my left (Challen Close) and a yellow Suzuki Swift (driven by a young woman, mid 20s to early 30s) pulls in behind me (I'm in a Toyota Vitz). With her mobile to ear, Suzuki has a chat. Takes 5 minutes to get to the on-ramp - still chatting. Ends call, then decides to check text and respond to it. All this with eyes downcast behind me. I pause before moving forward in the hope that someone will sneak into the widening gap - but she pulls up behind me; again texting."

Isn't a near miss a near hit?

"Why do they call it a near 'miss?' By definition this literally means actually being hit/struck by something. Surely we wouldn't report to a health and safety officer that 'the crate fell off the shelf and nearly missed me'. Which in turn means that it did indeed hit me. But in the workplace we count each 'near miss' as something that came close to injury but happened to be avoided. Shouldn't this term simply be called a 'near hit?' I would be grateful if somebody could explain this to me."

How about getting on with some real work!

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Regarding yesterday's item about the spelling of a safety notice: "I can only assume the clown who thinks this is funny has an office job, couldn't hit a nail with a hammer, hang wallpaper or drive a scissor lift," says Ross Fleming. "These guys often take up trades jobs because they love construction work, not pushing a pen. Horses for courses."

Women who stand and deliver

"I've always promised myself I'd keep the sci-fi geek side of me hidden away from the public," writes Colin Post. "I tried to shrug it off when I read your 'movies that could do with a gender flip'. But I feel I must right some wrongs and if that means outing myself as the nerd I am, well so be it!

1. Surely in Star Wars Princess Leia stood shoulder to shoulder with Luke and Han in their fight against that evil empire?

2. In Alien vs. Predator it wasn't some burly fella who teamed up

with the predator to save the world from being overrun by pesky

aliens, no! It was actress Sanaa Lathan fighting off the nasty beasts!

Ah, felt good to get that off my chest."

Working tap in a tree at welcome bay Tauranga. (Via
John Krauts)
Working tap in a tree at welcome bay Tauranga. (Via John Krauts)
@Stevecase
@Stevecase

Video: This is so cute it'll make you sick...

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Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz

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