Love at work can turn to HR nightmare

If you hook up with someone at the office, tell HR at once in order to cut off gossip before it starts.

Office romances bring with them a minefield of potential problems.

When two employees of a Christchurch insurance company decided to engage in sexual activity under the fluorescent lights of a glass-clad office, they had little idea of the furore that would ensue.

The amorous exploits of a 50-year-old married manager and a 25-year-old junior staff member at Marsh Ltd were visible to dozens of punters at the Carlton Bar and Eatery across the road - images of the pair were quickly uploaded on to social media.

Cue an international media frenzy, a failed marriage and cringing embarrassment for all concerned.

While this is an extreme case of the pitfalls of workplace romances, the incident brings into stark light just how wrong office affairs can go. Dealing with such situations can be an HR nightmare; the reputation of Marsh Ltd has been dragged through the mud and both employees have been removed from their jobs in the wake of the scandal.

Workplace romances are generally frowned upon. Some companies explicitly ban such practices - this is common in the United States and Europe, where office flings can be a firing offence under work contracts.

Fewer companies in New Zealand take such a strong stand, but there is a tacit agreement among most HR professionals that office romances are a professional red flag.

Independent HR professional Joan Watson has dealt with many issues surrounding workplace romances in her career. She says that the best way to deal with office amore is by having systems and policies in place to ensure that things don't get out of hand.

"Some companies have policies that state that people with any kind of relationship (be it familial or romantic) can't have a reporting role to each other. In this case, if a person entered a relationship with a manager or vice versa, they would have to be reassigned roles," she says.

Another issue can arise if a person begins a relationship with someone from a competing company.

"Pillow talk happens; this can really compromise the integrity of workers in competitive roles. I've seen situations where people have been removed from a role as their relationship with a competitor is seen as a threat to the company's competitive position."

Workplace romances can be the cause of much water cooler gossip - watching love bloom in the sometimes mundane environment of a corporate office can be rather titillating and entertaining. But serious issues can arise when the romance starts impinging on workplace performance. Relationships fail and there's nothing more difficult than having to deal with your faltering love life in a work context.

Watson says that it's important for employers to realise that any relationship - work-based or not - will influence performance, and that bosses should show compassion towards their staff if they are going through difficulties.

"Personal life will always impinge on working life; if a workplace romance (or any other form of relationship) is causing a staff member grief then it is good to offer the employee help and support."

One option for dealing with failed workplace romances is to relocate one of those involved to a new site or move them to a new team or desk where they won't be working in close proximity to each other.

Watson says that sometimes the requirements of work can throw together people who otherwise wouldn't be in each other's sphere of influence. She says that managers should think carefully about whom they choose for assignments, especially if they involve travel.

"If people of the same age, with similar interests and levels of seniority are thrown together for projects that involve a lot of overnight stays and travel, this can lead to difficulties," she says.

She suggests that managers take care with their decision-making in such situations - and that they don't pair up people who seem likely to form a romantic connection.

When it comes to advice on whether to embark on a fling with an eligible colleague, Watson has a simple rule of thumb - don't. "Having a one-night stand with a co-worker can be a recipe for disaster."

But she acknowledges that real connections can happen in the workplace, and recommends discretion in these cases.

"Make sure you are really serious about the person before deciding to embark on an office romance," she says. "And once you are, it's worth considering looking for a job in a different company, as work romance can put a lot of pressure on your performance levels."

She says it's also worth speaking to your HR person about the romance once it has been established.

"Be upfront and honest about the situation," says Watson. "This will help to garner respect from your managers and help mitigate any gossip that may occur around the situation."