Close the gates, Schultz!
It seems there's no escaping political campaigning right now. The same day that the National Party added yet more tunnels to its plan to turn Wellington into Stalag 13, a full-page advert in the Chronicle shouted "83 per cent say Yes!".
Like Sergeant Schultz, who was wont to declare "I see NOTHING! I hear NOTHING!", I tried to ignore the arresting headline and move on to the letters page, as is my wont.
But it got the better of me. I had to know: 83 per cent of who say yes to what? Aha, I thought. It must be politics because there's been a survey and down the bottom of the page a tagline straight from Labour's 1969 campaign book: "Let's Make This Happen!".
But on closer reading, it seems 83 per cent of 427 people surveyed said Yes, the Government should pick up the $26.3 million tab for the Raise the Velo Roof project, to create some jobs and salve our post-Covid-19 economic wounds. No ratepayer dollars would be harmed in the making of this bold venture, they promised.