Mary Holm said shame can be a mental effect of not having personal finances under control. Photo / Supplied
Personal finance is often put into the too-hard basket, but it's also something we can't avoid. So what are the outcomes on our mental health when the costs start to build?
Emma Bernard takes a look into the mental pressures faced when dealing with personal finances.
Mary Holm says money is an integral part of our lives.
"A whole lot of other facets you can say 'no that doesn't interest me', like sports, music or books," she says.
"But if you say that about money then it doesn't work."
Holm is an award-winning columnist who writes weekly in the Weekend Herald and has written seven financial advice books - four of which have been on the NZ bestseller list.
"You've got to have money to feed and clothe and house yourself, and you can't feed into other interests if you don't have a bit of money," Holm said.
The Consumer Pulse report analysed the financial concerns of over 18,000 New Zealanders over 18.
The findings, released in April showed almost a third of Kiwis worry about the state of their finances, with 20 per cent saying they lived payday to payday.
It revealed 58 per cent of New Zealanders spent more than they earned and 55 per cent of those surveyed had personal debt excluding mortgages - mainly credit cards and personal loans.
So what effect does this have on our headspace?
Niki Vernon is a former personal budget advisor for Whanganui Budgeting Service and now runs Money Poppins which provides business and financial advice for sole traders and micro-businesses.
She says financial difficulties were intrinsically linked to poorer mental health.
"You can imagine if you can't see your way out of something, it's not going to be any good for your mental health," she said.
She has worked in credit management for nearly 40 years and hadn't seen anyone who needed budgeting help who says their debt hadn't affected them negatively.
"It can be very hard if you can only just pay your rent, your power bill is more than you expected, your kids got hold of your mobile phone and bought things online."
She says these are real situations that are difficult for people to deal with when they're just trying to keep their heads above water.
But Vernon says getting into financial struggle is not the end of the road.
"A good start is to normalise talking about money.
"The more you talk about money with your family and friends, the less it becomes a taboo subject."
A survey of over 3000 New Zealanders by the Commission for Financial Capability (CFFC) showed financial concerns caused relationship problems with partners, family and close friends for one in five people.
While those with little or no income (under $10,000 per year) were most likely to experience financially-driven relationship problems (28 per cent), 21 per cent of those earning $150,000-$200,000 also reported relationship stress due to money issues.
Lynda Skogrand's research on successful relationships found happier couples had a plan to pay off existing debt, and ideally, it was best to have little or no debt.
Also, partners who had equal access to financial resources within the relationship and keep informed and talked about finances reported happier relationships.
Vernon says when people avoid talking, and "bury their head in the sand" regarding finances, issues snowball.
"And it snowballs fast. It only takes one small debt to go awry to start borrowing more without being able to pay anything back, and before you know it you owe quite a few people money," she said.
"Sometimes when people are in debt they'll just keep borrowing as much as anyone will give them because they think stuff it, I'm already in debt, it doesn't matter," she said.
Vernon says when people have this mentality they will always be in a very poor headspace.
Holm says some people just didn't have enough money and didn't want to think about it.
"It's not easy to escape thinking about it unless you use something like booze and drugs to do it for you, and that's not going to work well."
According to the 2018/19 New Zealand Health Survey by the Ministry of Health, one in five New Zealand women and one in seven men suffer from some form of depressive or anxiety disorder.
And while money issues weren't always the main contributor, studies elsewhere in the world show debt vastly increases our risk of mental health issues.
A 2016 UK survey by Money and Mental Health Policy Institute found nearly half of all people experiencing debt difficulties also had mental health problems.
And nearly 90 per cent of those said their financial situation had made their mental health problems worse.
Likewise, people experiencing mental health problems were found to be three and a half times more likely to be in problem debt than those without.
Holm says another common impact of financial struggles was the feeling of shame.
"Some people having financial struggles are on quite high incomes, but they don't necessarily want to tell anybody they're experiencing problems or reach out for help."
She says this was because they were ashamed they couldn't run their own money.
Vernon says from what she could see in Whanganui, people found it hard to reach out to the services available because it could be confronting.
"Our problem is not the people who go to budgeting, it's those who don't. I want people to know they can go and it's all free."
Vernon says the key is to change habits.
"We frequently see people who got themselves out of their debt but end up back in debt troubles in a few years because they haven't changed their habits.
"The idea is to learn how to be frugal from the beginning, and that's why we need to talk about money with our kids and families."
Vernon sees clients' psyches around working for money completely change when people got their finances under control because they could see the light at the end of the tunnel.
"They start working much harder because they see a way out," Vernon said.
"So go to budget advisors when it's just a small problem, not just when it's a large problem."
Vernon recommends free budgeting advisors such as Whanganui Budget Advisory Service Inc.
WHERE TO GET HELP
If it is an emergency and you or someone else is at risk, call 111.
For counselling and support
Lifeline: Call 0800 543 354 or text 4357 (HELP)
Suicide Crisis Helpline: Call 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO)
Need to talk? Call or text 1737
Depression helpline: Call 0800 111 757 or text 4202
For children and young people
Youthline: Call 0800 376 633 or text 234
What's Up: Call 0800 942 8787 (11am to 11pm) or webchat (11am to 10.30pm)
The Lowdown: Text 5626 or webchat
For help with specific issues
Alcohol and Drug Helpline: Call 0800 787 797
Anxiety Helpline: Call 0800 269 4389 (0800 ANXIETY)
OutLine: Call 0800 688 5463 (0800 OUTLINE) (6pm-9pm)
Safe to talk (sexual harm): Call 0800 044 334 or text 4334
All services are free and available 24/7 unless otherwise specified.
For more information and support, talk to your local doctor, hauora, community mental health team, or counselling service. The Mental Health Foundation has more helplines and service contacts on its website.
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