Go to grave in spritely fashion

Chris Northover PHOTO/FILE

Last Saturday was the day our big walnut tree had a haircut. It is a Japanese walnut so the nuts are small and hard to open. But the neighbours and we all agree it is a beautiful thing to behold - so beautiful that we can forgive the little bit of delinquency to which large old trees are prone. Two or three large limbs were hanging over my neighbour's garage - and rotting in areas that made a crushed car (or neighbour) a certainty in years to come.

Chainsaws were revving and flashing - branches dropping - ladders going up and down. What I noticed was the age of the blokes engaged with the lopping - between the four of us the average age was 68.

Her serene loveliness introduced herself to the tallest bloke there who said his name, and added: "OBE". "OBE"? she asked interestedly. "Yes - Over Bloody Eighty".

He didn't look it. Is 80 the new 60? Each one of us was capable of climbing up the tree or ladders, except for the one who was sitting down much of the time complaining of diseased lungs or other such nonsense.

Well, it was a nasty virus and I wasn't over it yet.

Certainly our perspective changes as we get older and people do tend to look younger - but in this case the 80-year-old looked about 65, the 66-year-old looked 50, the 62-year-old looked 45, and the other one just looked sick.

But our life expectancy has increased markedly over the last sixty or so years. In 1950 a New Zealand man could expect to live to 67 and a woman to 72.

In 2014 it is about 12 years longer at 79 and 84 respectively. Of course none of the tree fellers were smokers which would explain their spritely behaviour.

If we had been smokers the chances were that we would have all been either in hospital or at home waiting for our heart operations - regular smoking reduces the life expectation of men by 11.7 years and women by 15.6 years.

The shocker here is that life expectancy reductions for Maori smokers are about 19.3 years and 23.8 years respectively.

As a non-smoker coming from a family of aggressive smokers my sympathy falters when a smoker first sniffs the cancer or heart disease that will get them in the end. But here is where it gets really scary - some studies in the US and Canada show that smokers are up to twice as likely to have a car crash.

This is the case whether or not they are actually smoking at the time of the accident - which would indicate that smokers may suffer physiological impairment.

There may be "underlying behavioural differences between smokers and non-smokers that contribute to the difference in crash data", say the researchers. Whatever, I believe that the secret is keeping active, moderation in all things, and look after our bodies so we are able to leave the heritage that we want to leave to our descendants and community.

Decide for yourself now: is it slippers and remote control - or is it the course preferred by Her (not so) Serene Delightfulness: Life isn't about dawdling to the grave, but rather an adventure that ends skidding in sideways, champagne in one hand, strawberries in the other, totally worn out, screaming "yeehaaa, what a ride!" [Anon]

Chris Northover is a Wanganui-based former corporate lawyer who has worked in the fields of aviation, tourism, health and the environment.