Mum won't think it's funny
A dad writes: "My annual pilgrimage to the shops is at Christmas. All I have to do is to get a gift for my wife, chosen expressly by our 9-year-old son. This year, my son could not be dissuaded from this coffee cup (sorry, dear). He thought the line "be afraid, be very afraid" was funny and probably thought the PMT was the brand."
1. After seeing a brown snake in the front yard of a neighbour's house, Rodney Williams of Glenroi, in New South Wales, Australia, picked it up and bit its head off. Mr Williams, who admits he'd had a few drinks before the incident, said: "I bit its head off first so it couldn't bite me."
2. The Shanghai Daily reported that Shangmao kindergarten in Yangzhou City, China, will be charging a new fee - for parents who want the teachers to hug their kids - once when they arrive and again when they leave. This will cost NZ$15.50 a month.
3. A man was sentenced to nine years in prison by a court in Belfast, Northern Ireland, for having robbed an armoured-car guard. He made off with the guard's cashbox, but since the guard was on his way into Northern Bank, and not on his way out, the box was - unfortunately for the robber - empty.
That ought to teach him a lesson
The Times' legal section named this yarn the "Least Appropriate Sentence of 2012" ... A judge in Florida ordered a man who had assaulted his wife after an argument to buy her flowers, take her to dinner and then to bowling. A defence lawyer asked the judge, "Does he have to let her win?"
