COMMENT
Queen St brothel king Brian Le Gros, with branches in Wellington, Noumea and Tahiti, is fast becoming our very own Hugh Hefner. State television has even given him his very own Sylvania Waters-type show - or was that the new-look Documentary New Zealand? - where he plays the lovable but gruff mother hen to assorted male strippers, prostitutes and even a toddler of his own.
When he popped up in the media last week with the sad little claim that Auckland City's proposed new brothel bylaw would force the closure of his $5 million Queen St establishment, the White House, I even felt sorry for him.
Juliet's revenge, I immediately thought. Juliet Yates was the planning committee chairwoman in late 2000 when a non-notified resource consent was granted for what the application called a"cabaret/entertainment venue".
When I pointed out to her, after the consent was granted, that she'd rubber-stamped a brothel - or massage parlour as they were then quaintly called - she pleaded ignorance and thought it an "unfortunate" and "regrettable" use for the historic Queen St landmark.
Now, I thought, Mrs Yates had seized the chance to get her own back.
But it wasn't true. The clause in the draft proposed bylaw that Mr Le Gros was so upset about, the one excluding brothels from within 250m of preschools, schools and homes, didn't apply within the central city area. It was designed for suburbia.
The relevant clause, for the CBD, as amended at last week's city development committee, doesn't allow brothels within 250m of a primary, intermediate and secondary school. But there's no mention of pre-schools.
Mr Le Gros' anxiety arose from the presence, just 50m into Myers Park from his premises, of the Kindergarten Association's daycare centre. Why he didn't save himself - and us - the worry and check the details of the new bylaw before he began agonising out loud I don't know.
Not that I'd advise him to crack open any celebratory bottles on reading this. Not yet. Because one of the amendments passed last week could have created a new problem. It's the one about not being allowed within 250m of a primary, intermediate or secondary school. It just so happens that across Myers Park, out of sight and mind in Greys Ave, nestles Kadimah College, the Jewish school. Council officials were searching for tape measures yesterday to check it out.
There could also be a problem or two in Queen St with nearby language schools. Do they count as secondary schools, which aren't allowed as near neighbours, or tertiary, which are?
The other possible obstacle for the White House is the ban on "ground-level" activity. This was written in for fear that we could end up like Amsterdam with ladies of the night displaying their goods in shop windows.
From my knowledge of the White House, it should be all right. The working area, shall we call it, of the premises, is in the basement. Well, it is if the renovations were completed according to the plans submitted during the resource-consent hearings. In those plans the dozen or so work rooms - each with bed and en suite spa bath and shower - were labelled "accommodation suites". The councillors who gave the resource consent said they were told it was staff quarters. Which, I guess, in a loose sort of way, they are.
The bylaw also includes all sorts of other rules and regulations, including a ban on "lewd" signage and, for some reason, flashing lights that can be seen outside.
It goes to the full council this month then out for public consultation.
I'll get my penny's worth in now. As far as the White House is concerned, it would be wrong if this bylaw - either by design or mistake - forced this business to close.
If the Salvation Army, whose city headquarters are next door, was prepared to withdraw its objections to a 24-hour liquor licence for the premises two years ago after learning how the business operated, then the city should be as tolerant. If Kadimah College, for example, is within the 250m cordon sanitaire, then make the circle 200m instead.
When Mr Le Gros bought the crumbling old historic Theosophical Society hall, Mrs Yates praised him. Mind you, that's before she knew what sort of business he planned to run. She enthused about the patrons of the new, exclusive "gentleman's club" being able to sit in the splendour of the restored interior and "enjoy the historic values" of the landmark. And maybe they now do, between lap dances.
Whatever its present use, from the building's point of view, Mr Le Gros was the saviour. It was either him or the wrecker's ball. Before he spent somewhere between $1.8 million and $5 million (depending on which interview you quote from) restoring the building and establishing the new business, it had been a hangout for derelicts. Before that, a rave bar for lovers of very loud music.
Former Wellington Mayor Mark Blumsky spoke at the liquor licence hearing in favour, saying Mr Le Gros' businesses provided "a colourful addition to Wellington's nightlife and entertainment scene". If staid old Wellington thinks he is a good thing, we're going to look like a bunch of Ma Grundys if we drive him out.
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