Abuse. It's not OK. Child abuse, domestic abuse, or abuse permitted to exist on an individual or societal level in whatsoever manner is never OK.
The issue of abuse has reared its ugly head once again and been brought to our attention especially by two recent events; one being the death of an innocent 8-month-old baby with a 33-year-old man remanded in custody for assault on a child and the other being the release of the long-awaited Glenn inquiry report investigating the state of child abuse and domestic violence in New Zealand.
The patron of the report, former governor-general Dame Cath Tizard, said the report documented harrowing details from abuse survivors and read like a catalogue of despair. Chief panellist Marama Davidson, who conducted most of the interviews, remembers one woman in particular who explained that in the future, should any victim of domestic abuse seek her advice, that she would advise them to stay in the abusive relationship rather than endure further unbearable burden, stress and abuse as she encountered from seeking to address her situation through official process.
Police investigate on average 87,000 cases of domestic violence cases a year in New Zealand. The number of substantiated child abuse cases sits at 23,000, but according to the report the actual number of cases occurring could be as high as five times as many. It makes sense that domestic violence and child abuse is under-reported. Often victims are shrouded with fear, shame and diminished strength, health and esteem to deal with the repercussions of reporting incidences and abusive situations.
Because of this secrecy, Tizard poignantly points out, abuse thrives.
A few years back, after the fact, I became aware of a flatting situation where one of the occupants was frequently being beaten by her boyfriend. The flat was filled with people and eventually all were well aware of what was happening yet, for the longest time, no one intervened.
As time went by, the circle of people who knew of the situation grew until one day one person stood up and said enough was enough.
What makes a house full of grown adults resistant or reluctant to intervene in such a situation? What makes not only the victims but their friends, families and much of New Zealand society slow to respond to abuse thereby permitting it to perpetuate?
Fear of repercussions on the reporter and/or victim and their families perhaps? Lack of faith in redress? Indifference even?
Whatever the reasons, the Glenn inquiry report will help air and shed light on the situation and this is exactly what is needed to help combat this negative plague on our society.
Like fungus thrives under the covers of darkness, decomposing and absorbing the material on which it feeds and grows, so alike is the conditions upon which abuse thrives.
Throw some light and air on the fungus and it's harder to grow, and so too with abuse.
It's hard to hide with the spotlight on.
The $2 million inquiry, set up in late 2012 with funding from millionaire Sir Owen Glenn, aims to address New Zealand's appalling record of child abuse and domestic violence by giving a voice to those most affected. It sets out stark facts with its advocates calling for a professional, private and public culture and attitude change adopting a zero tolerance approach to abuse in our nation.
Having been released in election year, the issue is hot topic already with certain party leaders calling for a bipartisan approach to addressing the situation.
Abuse is debilitating and unacceptable therefore I applaud the initiation of this report, courageous participants and all those that stand to tackle this problem and to protect and support the restoration of the inflicted.