Sideswipe
A daily look at life's oddities by Ana Samways

Sideswipe: July 20: Relief for Islamophobia

14 comments
Photo / Supplied
Photo / Supplied

A Muslim group is handing out Islamophobin at The Republican National Convention in Cleveland. Islamophobin targets symptoms including "blind intolerance, unthinking bigotry and irrational fear of Muslims". Each packet holds six (regular mint) gums. (Via Quartz.com)

Actual sentences found in patients' hospital charts

1. She is numb from her toes down.

2. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

3. Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.

4. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

5. Patients medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only an 18kg weight gain in the past three days.

6. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

7. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.

8. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.

9. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.

10. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

11. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.

12. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

13. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

(Via viralslot.com More here.)

Spotted in Melbourne's eastern suburbs by a Sideswipe reader. Photo / Supplied
Spotted in Melbourne's eastern suburbs by a Sideswipe reader. Photo / Supplied

Why it pays to check your sources for river advice

Three women in Michigan decided to go tubing for the first time. When they arrived at a launch site on the Muskegon River, someone told them that there was no need to arrange for pickup downstream because the river ran in a circle. If they stayed in the water, they'd just float back to starting point. Alas, hydrology did not co-operate. Firefighters rescued them 20 hours later after they spent a night floating 5km downstream. (Source: American Digest)

No-nonsense nonagenarian

Alf Hoyle (90) filled up with petrol and went to pay. "Five cents per litre off if you buy two bottles of coke," said the woman behind the counter. "No thanks," I said. "Too much sugar." "How about five cents off for four bags of chips?" she said. "No thanks, too much salt." "That'll be $70," she said. I said that was rubbish too: "We should all be electric by now."

Legs of New York: A fantastic compilation of photographs of women's legs, there sure are a lot of wacky leggings in the Big Apple .

Good read: Giovanni Tiso's 24 tips for buying your first home (in New Zealand) are bitingly funny...

1. Skip buying your first home, which is clearly impossible, and move directly into buying the second or third.
2. Attend every open home in your preferred area. Once you have found one you really like in somebody else's price range, sit down at the kitchen table and refuse to leave.
3. Stop buying coffee out. In no time you'll be able to afford a home in the $4.50 to $9.00 range.
You must go here for the full list. Go on...

Video: An awesome clip to promote the Rio Paralympics - We're The Superhumans...





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Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz

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