Sideswipe: August 2: Christmas arrives early

"Please tell me this isn't what I think it is,'' writes Nicola. "Westfield Manukau setting up Santa's Grotto on the 31st of July?!''
"Please tell me this isn't what I think it is,'' writes Nicola. "Westfield Manukau setting up Santa's Grotto on the 31st of July?!''

Encouraging uniform behaviour

A Midland school is banning girls as young as 9 from wearing skirts - because girls are wearing them too short. Walkwood Middle School in Redditch has told girls aged 9 to 13 to wear trousers from September, and to wear shirts like the boys, instead of lighter fabric blouses from next year. Head teacher David Doubtfire said the ban was necessary to get some of the girls to cover up at school because their skirts were far too short, making them appear "unladylike". (Source:

Only thing more horrific than dating a fat person ...

The San Jose Mercury News advice column received this letter: "My son, who is 21, has been dating a girl for three years. When they began dating she was tiny, but she has gained significant weight. She is petite, about 5ft 3in (1.60m), but I'd say she weighs 150 pounds (68kg). My son says it bothers him that she has gained weight, and he has tried to encourage her to work out with him.

She has a foot injury that prevents her and she says she has gained weight since going on birth control ... She eats a lot of carbs, especially pizza ... She's endangering her health as well as hurting her appearance ..."

Humour site Bad Advice You Were Hoping For replies: "You've correctly identified the most major obstacle to your son's continued romantic success: the fact that your son's girlfriend has put on more weight than his mother is comfortable with ... The only thing more horrific than dating a fat person is for one's own child to date a fat person, whose distribution of adipose tissue is scientifically proven to block their ability to be funny, lovable, kind, decent and intelligent. One wonders if your son's fat girlfriend has ever considered how hard it is for her boyfriend's mother to be seen in public with someone else who is dating a fat person?"

Nice picnic, we should've brought the cats

Further to strange choice of picnic sites, Brian Burton of Pukekohe writes: "Many years ago I was driving through the Orana Park Lion Enclosure in Christchurch. We were absolutely horrified to see a car load of people - adults and children - who had pulled up under some trees, had got out and were laying rugs on the ground for a picnic. The next thing, sirens were sounding and three jeeps arrived, men carrying rifles got out and very smartly ushered the people, not only back into their car, but right out of the park. I cannot remember exactly where those big cats, nearly a dozen of them, were, but they were somewhere on the loose nearby."

Picture this #1: Tony Fouhse, an Ottawa based photographer, met Stephanie MacDonald, a young heroin addict, and documented her experience using in Living Thru This...

Picture this #2: I almost feel sorry for former National MP Aaron Gilmore. High up in the Google Image Search ranking because of his recent newsworthiness, his picture has been used to illustrate this story for a Spanish news site...

Picture this #3: "Hmm, not sure about Stardome's new cover pic," tweets Amanda Sheat.

Video: Caught picking rhubarb overgrowing from a neighbour's property, this old lady doesn't like being called on it...sounds like she needs an exorcism...(NSFW language)

Video: Minute Earth explains why some countries drive on the left and others the right...

- NZ Herald

Get the news delivered straight to your inbox

Receive the day’s news, sport and entertainment in our daily email newsletter


Have your say

1200 characters left

By and large our readers' comments are respectful and courteous. We're sure you'll fit in well.
View commenting guidelines.

Sort by
  • Oldest

© Copyright 2017, NZME. Publishing Limited

Assembled by: (static) on production bpcf04 at 24 May 2017 18:35:44 Processing Time: 665ms