Sideswipe: Jan 29: Getting the message across

Getting the message across (Via: Photo / Supplied
Getting the message across (Via: Photo / Supplied

Lies, damn lies, and parents

A study has found that the most commonly used lie by parents was telling a child that they were going to walk away and leave them during a tantrum. Another less sinister one was falsely promising to buy a requested toy at some time in the future or claiming not to have brought any money with them. And while some lies were a bit on the nose - "If you don't follow me, a kidnapper will come to kidnap you while I'm gone" - others were seen as acceptable. Telling a child that they would grow taller for every bite of broccoli was seen as OK because it encouraged healthy eating habits. Other more colourful lies submitted by readers included: "I was told dragons are extinct because they would have been a fire hazard on Noah's ark." And: "Unicorns died out because they were a recessive horse gene."

The mouse that gnawed

Police in Wichita, Kansas, do have a sense of humour. They held a press conference to release a photo of the suspect in a case of evidence tampering at their property and evidence department building.

They had determined that mice chewed into packages of marijuana. Lieutenant Doug Nolte said police followed protocol and photographed, weighed, and resealed the evidence. Exterminators have been called in to assist police in the case. "We do have a sketch artist that came and did a rendering of who we believe is responsible for the marijuana heist, and so, we are currently looking for something that resembles a mouse like this," said Nolte.

For better or worse ...

Going stag to a wedding? Yes, it is a cost-saving measure. Culling boy/girlfriends and any children not involved in the ceremony is a cost saving, explains this reader. "This is due to the unreliability of such guests in actually turning up on the day (the organisers still have to pay the costs per guest even if they do not attend). Ironically, the best way for your nephew's girlfriend to get an invitation is for him to 'pop the question' - then she's 'family' and not a 'hanger on'. Alternatively, he could offer to pay for her to attend. I priced out the cost per person for my 'economy' wedding including invitation, chair hire, table decoration per setting, food plus restaurant service charges and drinks. Each guest who attended the wedding and the reception cost about $200. Multiply that by the number of guests (the average minimum number of guests is about 150-200). That is the price of wedding etiquette!"

Picture this: Did you know with sports people it's almost impossible to distinguish a winning facial expression from an anguished one. Take this nifty online test and see if you can you tell the difference?

Prank: "My mom told me to "behave myself" before leaving for on a short trip out of state. So, I just wrote this fake article about myself and had our neighbor send it to her. I'm very good at testing the limits of her sense of humor." And she posted it on Reddit of course.

Video: A funny mockumentary by Tess Novak about a kiwi icon. Nice work.

- NZ Herald

Get the news delivered straight to your inbox

Receive the day’s news, sport and entertainment in our daily email newsletter


Have your say

1200 characters left

By and large our readers' comments are respectful and courteous. We're sure you'll fit in well.
View commenting guidelines.

Sort by
  • Oldest

© Copyright 2017, NZME. Publishing Limited

Assembled by: (static) on production bpcf05 at 27 May 2017 08:27:54 Processing Time: 269ms