Sideswipe

By Ana Samways

Hell Pizza has generated another wave of publicity for itself by including condoms and "explicit sex instructions" with its Lust Pizza promotion. These much-reported "explicit sex instructions" are the Ministry of Health-endorsed instructions on how to use a condom, not a Kama Sutra deal as some reports have made out. The most ridiculous over-reaction comes from Brendan Malone from Family Life International who says: "There is no telling how many of them will attempt to use the condom and follow the explicit instructions provided by Hell Pizza". He goes even further: "We know that young children have viewed pornography, then gone on to act out what they have been exposed to by sexually molesting other young children." Give me a break! None of the media organisations who were happy to report on the controversy has published a picture of the ad, for fear of giving Hell free publicity. TVNZ chose to illustrate the story with a generic picture of coloured condoms. But how can people judge for themselves if an ad is complaint-worthy or just lame if they don't see it? So here you are, readers, the Hell Pizza ad. And now at least when you're arguing about it over dinner, you'll know what you're talking about.

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Ric thought that he had heard all the reasons for able-bodied people occupying Disabled Car Parks ... until yesterday. "A Maori gentleman, of ample girth, parked next to me in a disabled parking space. When I asked why he was not displaying a disability card, he said that being tangata whenua entitled him to park there.

Unfortunately these advantages do not seem to apply to all New Zealanders."

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How do the parking companies in the Viaduct area justify their fees? They offer no shelter and no security, so how can they jump their prices from $5 to $10 for the high season?

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Chinese director Chen Kaige has been nominated for an environmental award because he damaged a pristine Himalayan lakeside area during the shooting of a film. Producers of his film, The Promise, were fined US$11,250 ($16,750) for destroying vegetation near Bigu Lake in southwest China's Yunnan province. Kaige has been nominated for the Green Chinese award, which picks five to 10 Chinese who have made "great contributions" to environmental protection, for highlighting the environmental issue through a negative example.

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Simon and Jeanine from Mt Wellington came down for breakfast the other day to find a small black dog staring in at them through the ranch slider window. (For picture click 'more pictures' above) "We can only conclude the poor thing was scared by fireworks last night, bolted and fell into our backyard, where at one point there is a 6ft (1.82m) retaining wall, and couldn't climb out. He has a red studded collar, but he doesn't have any other tags on him, so we don't know how to find the owner. We have to go to a wedding on Friday afternoon, and our great dane has a taken a very dim view of our unexpected lodger." If this is your dog, call Jeanine on (09) 580-2981 to get him back.

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