The worst baby names ever according to parents

Commenters have opened up about shocking examples they've come across including girls who'd been named Chlamydia, Vagina and Meconium. Photo / 123rf
Commenters have opened up about shocking examples they've come across including girls who'd been named Chlamydia, Vagina and Meconium. Photo / 123rf

Parents-to-be are often warned of the perils of choosing an unusual moniker for their child, namely lifelong embarrassment and teasing at school.

But it doesn't seem to put some parents off, according to a Quora discussion on names that you really shouldn't call your child.

Commenters opened up about shocking examples they had come across including girls who'd been named Chlamydia, Vagina and Meconium.

Sarah Geer shared a horror story of what can go wrong when you name your child something that looks "pretty or unusual" but don't know the meaning of the word.

WHAT'S THE WORST NAME YOU'VE ENCOUNTERED? SEND US AN EMAIL

A pertinent example was a young girl her mother-in-law met called C. Rose Smith.

When she asked what the C stood, for the girl became embarrassed.

"Her mother gave her a first name she thought 'looked pretty', but didn't know the meaning of," she explained. "The poor child's name was actually Chlamydia."

Similarly Jason Whyte heard of a mother who had named her child Meconium.

"The mother apparently heard this during her time in hospital and thought it the most beautiful word she'd ever heard," he explained.

Unfortunately, meconium refers to the first stool passed by a newborn.

Elizabeth Knight recounted a story from a nurse friend whose patient wanted to call her daughter Virginia.

"My friend asked her to spell the name, for the record, and the new mother said 'V-a-g-i-n-a.'

"My friend said that she was not allowed to tell a parent that the name isn't a good one. But she asked if she was sure that was the spelling she wanted, and the woman said yes."

Many people chimed in to advise against giving your child a conventional name with an unusual spelling to make them seem unique, such as M'k'n'z for McKenzie.

Julia Lopes had a particularly alarming example from a couple who wanted a twist on Kaitlyn.

"They named the poor child KVIIIlyn," she said. VIII is the Roman numeral for 8, for those unaware.

"There have been plenty of cases regarding putting numbers into names and just being ridiculous. Someone in Brazil once named their kid: 123 de Oliveira 4."

She added: "First names that 'match' last names are also horrible, like Phillip Phillips."

Andrea Claus Ring also advised being careful with the first name-surname combination, saying that she once knew a Dick Seaman.

"Our last name is Ring. Even though I always loved the name Belle, I couldn't do that to my daughter," she said.

Janet McKenna Lowry agreed with the need for caution, saying: "A kid arrested in a nearby town for doing drugs behind a dumpster was named Justin Paine. I don't blame him."

Nancy C. Walker was one of several commenters who advised naming your child after a product.

"The child will forever be known as the child of greedy parents. For a short while parents were selling the ability to name their child to the highest bidder and/or naming their children after popular brands in hopes of getting payments.

"Most didn't seem to care that their child would forever be called Microsoft or Xerox. Most companies don't want to be associated with this sort of thing so just don't do it."

Mike Harrison shared the tale of his Star Trek loving friend who named his children James Tiberius Kirk, Spock Sarek, Kathryn Janeway and Jean-Luc Picard.

And Brigitte Cave, also advised against naming children after fictional characters such as Khaleesi or Katniss, Anakin or Sherlock.

Natalie Frank had also encountered a woman with a baby called Banjo, the teenager from the film Deliverance.

Kimber McLaughlin came across the ultimate in bad taste when naming a child after a famous figure.

"I once knew a young new mother who wanted so badly to name her son a name she has always loved: Satan."

She was not an advocate of satanism, but just loved the sound of the name.

"Eventually enough people were very serious about NOT doing that and her husband very reasonably disliked the name enough, that she eventually reluctantly settled on. Statan (Stay-ton)."

Neil Hiatt knows of a child called Travesty, another user had come across a little girl named Pyjama while Ashton Smith, spoke of twins named Cloyce and Boyce.

Even worse, he'd heard of identical twins, both called Viola.

"The names were pronounced Vee-ola and her sister Vi-ola, but spelled the same way," he explained.

JPB Associates,There are a few that stand out in memory. In my line of work we kept a list back at the office of the most unusual names we came across. The first three are real situations that topped my list.

Banned: The names no Kiwi could have

In New Zealand, Internal Affairs has declined 494 name requests since legislation was introduced in 1995.

The department's rules forbid any name that implied a child held a title or a rank, so "Duke", "Prince", "Princess" and "Majesty" were dismissed.

These are the names rejected since the rules came in 21 years ago.

Justice - 77 rejections
King - 43
Prince - 43
Royal - 38
Princess - 37
Duke - 19
Bishop - 16
/ (in name) - 15
Messiah - 13
Royale - 12
Majesty - 11
Major - 10
Knight - 9
Lucifer - 7
J - 6
Queen - 6
Using brackets around middle names - 6
Judge - 4
Lady - 4
. (in name) - 3
Christ - 3
Empress - 3
Justus - 3
Justyce - 3
Regal - 3
Rogue - 3
Sir - 3
Using back slash between double-barrelled surname - 3
( ) name in brackets - 2
3rd - 2
Chief - 2
E - 2
I - 2
II - 2
III - 2
Jr - 2
Lord - 2
Master - 2
Mr - 2
President - 2
T - 2
V - 2
89 - 1
* (star symbol) - 1
9 - 1
2nd - 1
4real - 1
5th - 1
A.J - 1
Anal - 1
Baron - 1
C - 1
C J -1
Commodore - 1
Constable - 1
Corporal - 1
D - 1
Dr-1
Dame - 1
Duchess - 1
Dukey - 1
Eminence - 1
Emperor - 1
G - 1
General - 1
Goddess - 1
Honour - 1
H-Q - 1
Impryss - 1
Juke - 1
Justis - 1
Justyce-Lee - 1
Juztice - 1
Kingz - 1
Kyng - 1
L B - 1
M - 1
Mafia No Fear - 1
Majesti - 1
Majezty - 1
Mayjor - 1
MC - 1
Minister - 1
MJ - 1
MMMR - 1
Pryncess - 1
Prynce - 1
Queen V - 1
Queen Victoria - 1
Roman numerals III - 1
Royaal - 1
Royahl - 1
Royal-Rule - 1
S P - 1
Saint - 1
Sargent - 1
Sarjant - 1
Senior Constable - 1
Severe - 1
Suprintedent - 1
Using back slash between middle names - 1
Using brackets around middle name - 1
V8 - 1
VI - 1
Y - 1

- Additional reporting, NZ Herald

- Daily Mail

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