Back to the future
"A friend of mine picked me up recently in her new BMW," writes Alfred Hoyle of Rotorua. "As she pressed the button on the dash to start the engine she exclaimed, 'Look at this, a push-button start! What will they think of next?'. I hesitated before telling her that when I was a youth my Model A Ford had a push-button start, only difference it was on the floor and you thumped it with your foot."
The abridged version
"I miss the days when you didn't have to read someone's life story in a recipe book before you got to the actual recipe," writes a home cook. "We'd just gotten back from our vacation in ... [whole paragraph about their holiday] exhausted, we arrived home to find nothing but some sad-looking lemons and ... [detailed paragraph of everything in the cupboard] I'd heard about making ... from ... [history of every cooking show watched and what was cooked] so I decided to try ... [description of failed attempt at making recipe] the second time I tried it, I used ... [detailed description of second time] this recipe is really great because ...
[everything author likes about the recipe] my picky kids even loved it, they said ... [detailed conversation between kid and parent about recipe] anyway, I hope you enjoy ... [paragraph about how much author wants you to enjoy recipe and can't wait to hear what you think]."
Ladies and war do not mix!
A reader writes: "Yesterday morning Radio New Zealand's Suzi Fergusson spoke with political editor Jane Patterson about the SAS raid. She tweeted afterwards that a listener texted in: "If you have not the stomach for war go back to the kitchen where you belong." I listened to the report wondering if either journalist broke down in tears and couldn't go on, but no. There was not a skerrick of lady-emotion. In good-natured humour, Fergusson followed up with: "Two wimmin! Talking about war! He's right, what would I know ... only spent six years as a war reporter and went numerous times to conflict zones."
Leading up to the 21 Pilots concert a line-up of teens tented overnight on Friday for the Saturday night concert, writes a reader, even though the Vector Arena website said there would no lining up until Saturday morning. "I see a large, burly security guard on the job even though there is no concert until Saturday. Later I received a text from my daughter saying: 'There are two lovely ladies staying overnight that are taking care of us and they are setting up tables and chairs - they are so nice!' And then the Pizza Hut delivery car pulls up and out comes 21 pizzas! I am astounded by the care that Vector is giving these fans! Or did 21Pilots call Pizza Hut?"
Fully decent local comedy
Darryl. An Outward Bound Story was released on TVNZ on Demand this week and it was throughly enjoyable local content...Do yourself a favour and forget the friggin' doofus with the roses and watch this.
Video: Surfer dude want to erect a statue of the late Paul Walker from the Fast and Furious movie franchise and his pitch to the local council is awesome...
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