"This car was parked in the staff car park of a rest home in Albany, when I returned my Dad home after an outing on Sunday," writes a reader.
A little off colour ... on April 1
"I took my 14-year-old daughter shopping to her favourite store North Beach," writes a reader. "We both found some jeans that were a perfect fit. Mine were a deep, deep dark blue and had a warning label on them that read something like 'don't sit on your mum's cream sofa when wearing these - the colour will rub off'. I asked if the fabric was prone to fading and the young shop assistant told me the jeans aren't really meant to be washed. 'Just pop them in the freezer - that'll kill the bacteria, and wipe them with a cloth if you spill something on them'. It was April 1. I thought she was joking. She wasn't."
In 1908 a man named Malone was fined at Northampton for breaking hotel windows. He said he earned his living by catching rats and going from place to place exhibiting freshly-caught rats. These he tethered to a table with string, giving them a certain latitude, and then, with his hands tied tightly behind him, he fought and killed a rat with his teeth. Nine times out of 10 he was said to succeed, but frequently the rat bit him severely.
Sign promising much outside the best bookshop in Whangarei, The Piggery.
Denis writes: "Now, we all know about 'new season' potatoes and fruit, but one major sports goods retailer is advertising 'new season golf balls'. Does this mean they grow on trees? If so, where can I get one?"
Packed by Jesus
Jody was somewhat bemused to discover that one of two parcels from Fishpond in her letterbox was packed by Jesus. "The second one, presumably packed without divine intervention (by Juan), had leaked quite a bit into the bag. Juan, maybe ask yourself next time, what would my colleague Jesus do?"
After reading about the Panama Papers - a leak of confidential documents revealing how the rich and powerful use tax havens to hide their wealth - Mike concludes: "It's really expensive being rich - being poor costs almost nothing. It would be totally unfair if the rich have to pay tax as well."
How to get drunk by eating bread? What? Carbo-loading can have the same effect as drinking if you have a rare condition called
Video: This whale-watching boat is coming into dock fully fast...
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