I do a lot of travelling in my life as a singer of songs, teller of tales, donner of sparkly frocks. In and out of hotels in glamorous resort locations, sprinkling fairy dust on people's celebrations.
But it's not a holiday.
My eternal refrain after one of these trips is, I must come back here for a holiday. To quote great philosopher 20th-century philosopher Charlene, "I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me."
Travelling for work is like that. A real holiday is getting away from it all and rediscovering yourself. It's pressing the reset button. There's nothing like a good dose of the strange and exotic to remind you of who you are once you strip away the layers you're usually wrapped in; Grey Lynn mother-of-two, performer, minor recidivist celebrity.
In this photo I am riding a bike in a village in Vietnam, I can remember how gorgeous the air felt on my skin; like warm, soft, thick, sultry, billowing silk. And I remember the feeling of rhythm and peace and joy filling my heart to the brim. My family thought it was the eighth wonder of the world seeing me on a bike. I have a bike in Auckland. I never ride it. I'm too scared of Auckland drivers. In a small village in Vietnam, riding a bike is paradise.
Just out of shot are the rest of my family, our guide and two preppy young American men. I'm trying to decide whether they're lovers or friends. Regardless of the facts, I've invented an entire back story of romance and intrigue for them in the short time we've been riding along.
We're off to visit with an elderly local woman. She makes us tea and shows us how to make a hand broom (like a mini Samoan salu), shows us her family shrine and proudly outlines the elaborate family tree that adorns one of the walls.
She's never been on a plane and is fascinated about how we've flown from the other side of the planet in a pressurised metal tube and ended up in her home. Her family is now all in the big smoke and I think she lets the tourists visit because she enjoys the company. She doesn't need to travel. She is letting the world come to her, one tourist visit at a time.
Judging by the curiosity sparkling in her eyes, I think we're a holiday for her too.
Jackie Clarke stars in Respect, alongside Annie Crummer, Bella Kalolo, and Ria Hall, at the inaugural Te Tairawhiti Arts Festival in Gisborne from October 4-20. tetairawhitiartsfestival.nz