Okay team. Let's get our calculators out, because today we are going to crunch some very important numbers.
That's right, we are going to work out when the Duchess of Sussex is most likely to give birth. (I promise, no algebra will be involved.) Because, if Kensington Palace won't give us a date, I'll bloody try and work it out for myself, reports news.com.au.
See, this week the Duchess, along with a slew of other senior royals, donned their best colourful coats and trotted along to Westminster Abbey to celebrate Commonwealth Day. Meghan opted for a $16,000 outfit, because, why not? She's a goddamn royal and has all of that Duchy of Cornwall coin to spend. There, she was seen greeting her sister-in-law and partner in persistent feud speculation, the Duchess of Cambridge, with a peck on the cheek and reportedly teared up during one particularly moving musical number.
All in all, a busy day for the newest member of Team Windsor.
However, according to reports, the service was most likely Meghan's last official public engagement before her baby arrives.
Now, Kensington Palace has never officially confirmed when the former Suits star is likely to pop (that's the technical term, right?). Unlike Kate's pregnancies, when they at least offered up at a vague time frame of when the newest royal sprog was set to appear, with Meghan, it has been something of a very frustrating guessing game for those of us who spend an unnecessary amount of time thinking about the royals.
It is widely rumoured that Meghan will give birth some time around the end of April, and comments she herself has made when mingling with the public have support this timetable. However, it is all pretty much conjecture.
So, let's do some cold, hard calculations and use maths to try to answer this vexing question, or at least make an educated guess at it.
Let's assume the best template we have to work off here is Kate and figure out how long between her last official engagement and each of the deliveries of her three wee HRHs.
Firstly, with Prince George, Kate's final public event was the Trooping the Colour on June 15, 2013, before he arrived on the 22nd of July, 2013. Total — 37 days gap.
In 2015, Kate and Wills visited the Stephen Lawrence Trust on March 27, before Princess Charlotte popped out on May 2, giving Kate 36 days off.
Finally, with Prince Louis, Kate appeared at a mental health symposium on March 22, 2018 and then he entered the world on April 23, which is 32 days difference.
Now, thanks to my trusty calc, I can tell you that gives us an average of 35 days between Kate's final fascinator-required outing and going into labour.
Assuming reports that the Commonwealth Day service was in fact Megs' last foray as a working royal pre-birth, that means her due date is … duh, duh, duh! April 15.
There is one other tantalising clue that supports the theory that Meghan is likely to give birth sooner rather than later. Stepping out this week in her five-figure designer ensemble, there was one key thing missing from her look: Her whopping engagement ring.
According to experts, it is common for women's hands and feet to swell in the very final stages of pregnancy and some argue the fact Meghan has ditched her diamonds (albeit temporarily) is an indication that the big day is right around the corner.
So, ready the cannons and dust off the royal birth announcement easel (yep, that is a thing): There is a royal baby on the way! One day. Soon.