Michelle Jans, San Francisco, aged 25, 2019

In Christchurch, everyone knows everyone, but everyone also remembers who you were in high school and refuses to see you any differently. Which is why travelling to San Francisco alone was the most amazing experience. For the first time in my life, no one knew me, and I could be whoever I wanted to be.

I spent three weeks being confidently and unapologetically myself; because I didn’t have to worry about what people would think of me. Once back in NZ, I kept that energy going with a new confidence in myself that I’ve never let go.

Ayla Miller, India, aged 25, 2017

I travelled to India alone for two months in 2017 and it was an incredible adventure. I find travelling by myself more rewarding because everything you do is your own achievement. I also always meet more people when travelling alone than in a couple or with a friend as you are automatically more approachable.

This particular trip taught me to trust that things will always work out in the end and that there are always far more kind, helpful people than ones you need to worry about

Patty Lagera, Tahiti/Bora Bora, 30s, 2019

To be in one of the most romantic, couple-filled places on earth by your lonesome self was liberating.

While in Tahiti and Bora Bora in 2019, I befriended strangers, dined at a fancy restaurant alone, swam in the clearest, bluest oceans I’ve ever had the pleasure of dipping in, and even hitchhiked for the first time and literally jumped into the back of a van.

Bora-Bora will remain in a special place in my heart for reestablishing the foundation of independence and self-love.

Petar Vrecic, Prague, 20s, 2014

In my early 20s, during a sculpture trail walk in Prague, I learned how to “put down the guidebook”. During the walk, I would check the sculpture map at every intersection to make sure I took the most efficient route. Checking the map for about the sixth time, I realised I was stressing myself out, so binned the map and followed my nose instead.

Travelling this newfound way meant I came across things I would never have found on a map, which was so rewarding.

Helen Van Berkel, Various trips

I’ve cruised alone, tramped alone, road-tripped alone – and each trip has been the most fun ever just for being alone. Not having anyone else to tut-tut over that extra glass of wine, or to remind me that actually, I should never, ever do karaoke, or perhaps mooning those other tourists is not a good idea, means I can be free to put myself out there with people I most likely won’t ever see again.

It forces me to step out of my comfort zone to find an entirely new one. I get a richness of experience that would be unavailable to me if I was trying not to embarrass myself in front of my loved ones.

Hamish Gleeson, NZ, aged 22, 2023

During a four-day holiday down South to Christchurch I learned that no one cares; the anxiety of sitting at a cafe or restaurant alone and thinking people are staring at you couldn’t be further from the truth. In fact, looking around the restaurant I was in, I could count five people alone at their own table.

Solo travel has taught me to enjoy my own company and gives me the chance to do the things I want to do when I want to do them. While not a massive overseas trip, it has given me the confidence to now travel internationally to places like Australia and the US, which I’ve booked!

Adele Croucher, Europe, aged 30, 2022

In 2022 I campervanned solo through Europe for six months. Travel can be chaotic, every city is so different; not knowing the language or what road signs mean, trying to find your campsite or the supermarket and translating the backs of packages in said supermarket. My moment of calm was often visiting a gym using ClassPass (an international app).

For 90 mins, I knew the machines and how they worked and I didn’t need to worry about language, missing flights or getting lost. Working out kept me grounded, it gave me that calm in chaos I needed for longer travel.

Ethan Sills, Europe, aged 22, 2017

I did a TopDeck around Europe by myself and the awfulness of dealing with 50 Australians over seven weeks has seen me go only on solo holidays since - mostly confined to Melbourne and Disney World and some other US states.

The TopDeck experience made me realise how much I prefer my own company and being able to just do what I want without having to factor in other people.

Shaun Wilson, Scotland, 2013

On my first visit to Scotland’s prize jewel of a city, my focus was on the plethora of theatre the Edinburgh Festivals have to offer, but multiple people insisted I had to go watch The Royal Edinburgh Military Tattoo. I ventured forth to watch NZ military personnel performing Gangnam Style, massive light shows, a huge storybook about a fox, and small children on even smaller motorbikes. All framed within military traditions, brass music, and the notion of the Commonwealth. I have yet to witness anything more confusing and I loved it.

I learned that even when you’re making your own way on a solo trip, taking on board others’ suggestions can lead you to experiences like the reality-crumbling cultural collision I witnessed.

Anna King-Shahab, Croatia, aged 26, 2006

I learned to climb around the rocks, duck down the alleyways, and follow my nose for fun – the best bars and restaurants are often tucked away out of sight. In Dubrovnik this meant makeshift-style bars operating on the cliff face, settling into a nook on the rocks and gazing out on the denim blue sea-sky. Plastic cups filled to the brim with cheap wine, tucked into cup holders fixed onto the rocks so the wind wouldn’t wreak havoc with glass.

Adele Thurlow, Ohio, aged 30, 2007

During a trip to Ohio, I learned one should check for seasonal theme park closures before eagerly travelling to the Roller-Coaster Capital of the World.

As a result, I also learned the hard way that there’s not much else to do during a wintry week in Cleveland, Ohio — also disparagingly referred to as “The Mistake on the Lake”.

Varsha Anjali, Chile, Bolivia, Peru, aged 22, 2014

When travelling to Chile, Bolivia and Peru I was told only the blonde girls would have trouble with guys and keeping safe - as an Indo-Fijian woman, I wouldn’t have to worry about “travelling while brown”. However, I was nearly harassed every day and violated twice. I’ve been on many trips since and had more hairy situations too. So, my point is, it can happen to anyone, anywhere but I didn’t let it stop me from experiencing the joys of solo travel.

Here’s what has helped me: Stay in all-female dorms, learn the local language, always pay attention to who’s around you, who wants to talk to you, who keeps creeping up, and walk strategically. For the men reading this: be an ally. If you see something isn’t right, speak up or do something.

Leanne Warr, US, 40s, 2003

I went on a trip to the US, by myself to meet a couple of friends I’d met online (we’d been talking for a couple of years by then) and stayed a couple of days in LA. I was staying at a hotel near the airport but since I’d barely ever travelled before, I didn’t realise I needed to have my visa debit card loaded up on registering (I didn’t have a credit card then) and had no idea about tipping.

Thankfully the manager was very helpful but I learned it pays to research where you’re going and what some of the requirements are.