Deadbeat dads in double

A Brazilian judge ordered two men — identical twins — to pay child support to a child whose paternity could not be determined after they both refused to assume responsibility and a DNA test proved inconclusive because of their genetic similarity.

The mother, Valeria, said that she started dating one of the brothers, who she assumed was Fernando, after meeting him at a party. At least the man introduced himself as Fernando, although looking back on the day they met, she remembered he rode a yellow motorcycle he said was Fabricio's.

After hearing about the twins impersonating each other in the past, there's no way for her to know which one of the brothers she slept with. Fernando underwent a DNA test which showed a 99.9 per cent probability he was the father of the child. Despite this, Fernando denies he had fathered the girl, pointing the finger at his identical twin brother, Fabricio.

The DNA test yielded the same result as Fernando's, because the two have virtually the same genetic code. In her testimony, Valeria said: "They know the truth, but they are taking advantage of their resemblance to escape responsibility." Left with no option, the judge ordered both of them to pay child support to the same child.

Q: How much would you pay for this plate of awesomeness at a cafe at Auckland Airport? A: $7.50. Photo / Supplied
Q: How much would you pay for this plate of awesomeness at a cafe at Auckland Airport? A: $7.50. Photo / Supplied

Domestic goals to sigh for

Writer Anne Thériault tweeted a tongue in cheek list of goals for women over 35 ... Things like, "Walking around the house saying, 'Why is every single light on? Do I look like I'm made of money? Open a curtain for once, will you?' and 'Wonder aloud why this room that she just tidied is messy again' and have developed a library of sighs." That went viral and her followers added theirs in the same vein ... "tuts, sighs, swearing under breath, picking up discarded socks, shutting randomly open cupboard doors, turning off telly in empty rooms, asking rhetorical questions, entering a room and having to immediately find a way to get the air circulating and aggressively wiping bench tops."

Mondegreen confessions

"For ages I thought Manfred Man was singing, "Blinded by the light, revved up like a douche, another runner in the night ... "