NZ Herald reporter Tess Nichol has signed up to boot camp in a bid to get shredded for summer. A self-confessed couch potato, this is her very honest journey to getting fit.
I've never really been a morning person.
One ex-boyfriend gave my just-woken persona the nickname "Gremlin", which in retrospect was probably cuter than it could have been considering my behaviour.
But there I was, up at 6am to make it to Auckland's Victoria Park in time for 7, sneakers on and hair pulled back ready for my first ever boot camp session.
The 45 minutes of squats, press-ups, planks and sit-ups, done on high rotation with minimal breaks, nearly killed me.
To make matters worse, a lovely Herald photographer was there to capture every embarrassing display of weakness on camera to cut into a video, to be put on the internet where it will remain forever.
I puffed and strained my way through the session, and by the end I was red faced but feeling pretty pleased with myself because I hadn't thrown up - my biggest fear.
My trainer Raphael Barcello was kind to me, telling me I'll be doing 100 sit ups in no time.
This seemed unlikely considering I can't even do one proper one yet but I wanted to believe him.
The next two days would be even worse he said, and he was right.
My muscles were so sore I cajoled a colleague into buying me a coffee because I couldn't bear the thought of lifting myself out of my chair.
I couldn't even comfort myself with a nourishing glass of wine.
Lifespark nutritionist Kate walker's "shred it" plan means no alcohol for at least three weeks and preferably five.
The cravings were terrible all week, and I nearly caved a day in while sadly taking a beautiful unopened bottle of Riesling out of the fridge to store away until I'm allowed to drink again.
Things do get easier - it's true that the less sugar you eat the less you crave, and by the end of the week I don't feel quite so mournful when I remember I can't have my usual 3pm donut.
Alcohol is harder.
I went to a friend's birthday do at a bar on Saturday night and lasted about an hour before packing a sad and going home because everybody else had a lovely glass of beer and all I was allowed was fizzy water with lime.
I didn't miss having a hangover though.