We all have a different story
Acknowledge that we all have a 'story' that we have been told since we were born and everybody's stories are going to be different and equally as real. This 'story' that we have been told gets passed down from our caregivers, society and a degree of genetics. So each generation brings 'the story' to pass on to the next and so on. This is evolution. No matter who told us the story we need to accept that we have our own unique one and who or what decides which story is right and what is wrong will come down to where we place our intrinsic values and why.
What we believe is what we see and what we see is what we believe
Our belief system is created from this 'story' and at a young age these are formed. Our beliefs then become a filtering system which is constantly filtering what's happening around us, either challenging our beliefs and often making us uncomfortable or agitated, or reinforcing them and making them stronger! As adults only we can decide how long we are going to sit with being uncomfortable or comfortable with our unique belief system - we can never expect others to change to suit ours! We can, however, rest assured that what we believe WILL determine what we see, which reinforces what we believe.
What we value is formed from our stories and will determine our responses
What we place value on comes from our belief system (which has come from our story). These are all usually subconscious, however are in direct relationship to our conscious mind which determines our levels of motivation - or in other words our reasons for doing something or not. This cycle from story to beliefs, values and actions will determine our choices and responses to things that happen to us and around us.
All of which become ...
Our identity. For the most part we tick along and none of this matters. However, if we have found ourselves in a place with a need to increase our wellbeing because things just aren't going that well, then we need an intervention in at least one of these areas to break the cycle. Some beliefs are so entrenched that it can be difficult (but not impossible) and at other times it's easier - it all depends on our story and how big it is. Neuroscience can now prove that our identity is not set in concrete - how can it be when we have the ability to create new pathways of thinking? Hypnotherapists have known this for a long time. We can change and learn how to do this ourselves once we understand this cycle, and when we change the way we look at things the things we look at are guaranteed to change. Maybe the question is how brave are we to even consider the possibility of taking responsibility ourselves to challenge our own stories?
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