A tip for organisers - if you're going to have a "celebrity" event, you better make sure you have some celebrities lined up.
Sunday's running of the Queen St Mile (QSM) will be preceded by a "celebrity" race. We at Supershorts Towers understand how smart-arsey the use of quotation marks around words like "celebrity" can seem, but on this occasion we have no choice. Clearly, lists A, B, C and D were at the opening of an envelope somewhere, so QSM organisers have rustled together one of the more curious "celebrity" line-ups of modern times.
They include television presenter Peter Williams, who has been in and on the news lately so can just about lose the quote marks.
The names of former swimmer Melissa Ingram, short-lived Kiwis coach Gary Kemble and short-lived Black Cap Peter McGlashan should resonate with most diehard sports fans, as will Black Sticks players Simon and Marcus Child and Hugo Inglis. But celebrities?
We also have Wayne Walker, Darryn Hopewell, Simon Andrews, Luke Witteveen and Kushla Glauser. Yes, your guess is as good as ours.
Memorabilia mission
For those of you hankering for a piece of Brendon McCullum memorabilia, but are finding the $999 for a "limited edition" a little steep, you could try for a number plate... wait a minute, that's gone too. Somebody has already bought the BAZ302 number plate. Never mind, you can still get an MDC299 plate for a snip.
Germans' bridge too far
From the Independent comes this terrific yarn: "In the words of the World Bridge Federation, it was reprehensible conduct of the highest order. By dint of carefully timed coughs, two German doctors cheated their way to the pinnacle of this most genteel of card games.
"After a two-day hearing in a Dallas hotel last week, the games governing body declared that Michael Elinescu, 61, and 71-year-old Entscho Wladow deployed subterfuge, in the form of a system of coded coughs, to win the bridge world finals during a fiercely contested tournament in Bali last year.
"In a ruling that demolishes the image of bridge as a high-minded pursuit unsullied by trickery, the WBF found the Germans, both medical doctors, had broken law 73B of the card game, which states: 'The gravest possible offence is for a partnership to exchange information through pre-arranged methods of communication.'
"Dr Elinescu and Dr Wladow now face the ignominy of being stripped of the gold medals they won against American opponents in September. They have also been banned from playing any other WBF fixture together for life."
NZ's record
Some great stats via Cricinfo. Kane Williamson's 42 runs (70 per cent of New Zealand's 60) against Sri Lanka at the World T20 is the highest percentage contribution to a team's total in an international T20, overtaking a record held by David Warner.
Take that Australia.
It was also only the second time in an international T20 where both skippers - McCullum and Lasith Malinga - made ducks.
Wife swapping gone wrong
When Sky Sport pundit - and former Manchester United skipper - Gary Neville was asked live on air which of Liverpool or Manchester City he would prefer to win the English Premier League, he rose to the occasion.
"It's like having a choice of two blokes to nick your wife," he quipped. As expected, social media ate the clip up and the Daily Mail turned it into a spread.