"We received this flier in our mailbox this week from the Labour candidate for Waitaki," writes Alan Grant. "Thought you might appreciate one of the oldest proofing errors in the book rearing its head again."

Language of love

There are buzzwords galore to use to describe when people treat each other badly in relationships. You probably know "ghosting" (disappearing without a word from a relationship) but probably not "haunting" (when someone you've ended things with suddenly appears on your social media feed, leaving you with that sick feeling you tried to move on from in the first place). I had heard of "breadcrumbing" (when someone online leaves you a trail of flirtatious messages that make you crave more, but then never meet them IRL) and "benching" (when you are undecided about someone you are dating, so you put them "on the bench" just like in sport and look around to see if anyone better is out there) but not "kittenfishing" (presenting yourself on a dating app in an unrealistically positive way) or "gatsybying" (Posting a Snapchat to your story and then waiting for that one specific person to watch it, is the modern day equivalent of Gatsby throwing elaborate parties seeking Daisy's attention). And now two more to be added to the mix: There's "cushioning" (the practice of buying yourself a little insurance while you're in a relationship by stringing along a few other people - called "cushions" - so you have something to fall back if you get dumped) and "stashing" (You're in a new relationship and everything seems great, except ... you've never met any of your new love's friends or family).

Thick jacket

That jacket is as thick as two short planks.
That jacket is as thick as two short planks.

Phoney stories

"Brian Pinny said it is 'illegal' to use your mobile device at a service station, in Friday's Sideswipe," writes John Coburn. "There is no such law. He may also like to check out the Myth Busters episode where they experimented to see if a mobile phone could trigger an explosion or fire near a fuel bowser. Result: a very boring mythbusting episode. You can safely text or call while pumping gas, unless your Samsung picks that moment to burst into flames."

How very...

Video pick

An impressive Rube Goldberg machine from Japan that takes up the whole room and goes on forever without faltering...

Advertisement


Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz