Psychologically unhealthy plots

"There's only one thing in this world worth having. Love. L-o-v-e. You love somebody. Somebody loves you. If you don't get that, you take the next best thing. Money, fame, whatever you can grab ... ' begins the blurb from The Next Best Thing, by Charles Mergendahl (Panther 1966). "For Michael Slayton, wealthy, ruthless, demanding, the next best thing was his power over others. For his wife it was a madness she called religion. For his beautiful daughter it was alcohol. For Slayton's son, Roy, it was orgies of sex all over the world. Because the woman who meant love to Roy was the one woman he must never have. Until his desire became too great ..." (Via everythingsecondhand.tumblr.com)

Medical time wasters

1.

"I'm a veterinary technician. I once had to explain to a frantic client that the ticks she had frantically been trying to remove from her male dog's belly with tweezers were actually his nipples. I also told her she had an extremely well-behaved, patient dog."

2."Had a woman measure her baby's temperature by pre-heating the oven and putting one hand in front of it while the other hand was on the baby's forehead. She told the nurse her baby's fever was about 250 degrees."

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3. "For almost a month, my friend had random pains, bruises started showing up randomly. He looked ashen and what we first thought was him being lazy was actually him not having any energy. Finally his girlfriend got him to agree to go to the doctor, who sent him to the ER, where it took several doctors to figure out what was wrong, either because none of them had actually seen it in real life before, or they didn't think someone could be that stupid. Quote the doctor: 'You have scurvy. Eat an orange'." (Via Reddit)

 When the office water coolers get married. Photo / Supplied
When the office water coolers get married. Photo / Supplied

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