Hello and welcome to my final column of the year. This will be a "best of" column because I'm officially on holiday now and I can't be bothered writing any more. So now let's look back on some of my earlier columns and pick out the best bits ...
Remember my first column? It was back in September, I had just returned from my UK standup tour, I was exhausted but happy to be home. I brought up the fact that most people who know of me call me by my full name ...
"Hello readers! It's me Rhys Darby. I'm so used to hearing people use both my names when referring to me that even I'm doing it now. Kids seem to do it the most. Every time I arrive at my friend's house his kids run to the door and yell "Hello Rhys Darby!" Sometimes I feel like just joining the words together and becoming Rhysdarby ... Darby."
The following week I recalled my frequent trips to Los Angeles. Some people call it the City of Angels but not me, I call it the city of meetings. Here's an example of the dialogue I frequently have with my agent:
"Okay Rhys, you've got an important meeting today. I just want to have a quick meeting to make sure you're ready."
"Righto, umm I'm just in a meeting at the moment. Can I call you back?"
"Sure but I might get you to talk to my assistant because I'm going into a meeting shortly."
Back home in New Zealand, I was busy working. Since my return home in August I have been flat tack with writing (no, not just these columns). I've been working on my own TV show under the management of my buddy Buttons' production company. You may have heard me mention him a few times this year. That's because I love him. Like me he's a real kid at heart ...
I often wonder, what is the cutoff age for youthful fun? I see lots of men in their 30s skating on longboards. My right-hand man Buttons even purchased a special pushing pole so he could grace his way along the paths like a punter in Venice. Was he ridiculed? Of course, but that has nothing to do with his pole.
Around about the 26th of November I prematurely announced that summer had arrived. Of course a week after that we were hit with torrential downpour, but hey that's the Mayan prophesy for you. Luckily the Doomsday didn't arrive, my youngest son turned 3 and my eldest son got a bike without training wheels for Christmas (which is still sitting in the corner of the lounge).
So there we have it. That brings us up to date and now we're all left with those niggling thoughts of 2013. What will it bring? There's no "end of the world" to look forward to this time but at least my annual New Year's resolution of finding an inter-dimensional gateway through space and time still stands!
Be safe out there kids.