By Tayla Mitchell
Laura Langman has not closed the door on a return to the Silver Ferns despite ruling herself out for next year.
Langman told Radio Sport's D'Arcy Waldegrave her decision to re-sign with the Sunshine Coast Lightning in the Australian league was difficult, especially with the Commonwealth Games scheduled for Gold Coast next year.
The decision means that under Netball New Zealand rules she will be ineligible for the Silver Ferns.
"From my perspective, I never shut that door. I would never shut that door it means too much, it just couldn't happen this time round."
Langman said that the decision to stay came down to living by the values she had been taught as a Silver Fern.
"Obviously I've been around the Ferns so their values became my life values and I wanted to really live true to them and so my decisions over the last few years, I feel I have been really living those values.
"Everything I do I've done for the black dress and to be the best person and player I can be to take back to the environment."
Langman felt that the timing of her returning to the Silver Ferns was just off, especially right before a pinnacle event.
"I think, I'm only one very, very small piece of the Netball New Zealand outfit, so you know I think that the New Zealand depth is really impressive currently, so it came down to a need, was there a need? Possibly not and you know it's a pinnacle event...so timing is a very big factor to ring something new in so close you've gotta consider than really quite seriously."
The decision to stay on the Sunshine Coast was not taken lightly.
"It's been a hugely difficult time. One I've probably made with a very heavy heart and a lot of tears but I'm happy," Langman said.
It has been a pretty special time for Langman and her Lightning teammates who had just won the Suncorp Super League.
"Obviously the season was pretty special. I think what Noels [Noelene Tauraua] and Kylie [assistant coach Kylie Byrne] were able to create in nine months, it certainly was a taste of what potentially could be given a bit more time with this group, boy that sounds exciting to me."