By now you've all heard Lorde's new song
. By now so have I. But right now, as I sit here writing, I haven't. Because it's not out yet.
So, you tell me. Is it any good? Has Lorde delivered unto thee, the goods? Do you like it or do you don't?
Whatever it is you think about it at least you get to think something. I'm still stuck with cryptic puzzles, 15 second song snippets and a Pokemon Go inspired map of geocache locations I'm too lazy to venture to.
In fact, it was only moments ago that Lorde revealed her weeklong breadcrumb trail of mysterious tweets, strange little videos and coded website were all leading towards the release of this one song.
Before that I had been like a deer frozen in wondrous awe gazing deep into the bright headlights. I knew something was coming I just had no idea what.
Perhaps it had been a bit much to hope that she would be dropping her long awaited and much anticipated second album today.
Beyonce, Rhianna and Kanye are all big enough to get away with the "surprise album drop" strategy but Lorde?
There's buzz, hype, and a legion of thirsty fans all salivating for it yes, but those aforementioned artists all transcend pop and, let's be honest here, music itself.
Lorde is undoubtedly right up there, but she ain't no Kanye. Not yet, anyway. Though it's surely only a matter of time.
Besides, these things aren't called "teaser campaigns" because they offer a timely and satisfactory conclusion. No.
Instead they're designed and calculated to prod and poke at your brain, enticing and exploiting your natural human curiosity for ruthless commercial gain.
Fair enough. If you're gonna do some marketing then the least you can do is make it interesting. Lorde certainly appears to have had a lot of fun driving everybody crazy this week and I know plenty of people who have enjoyed getting caught up in the event of it all.
My social feeds have been full of people sharing and speculating all week long and at the office I've seen groups of people huddled around a single computer, all working together in an attempt to decipher the so far unrevealed album title.
Having pumped so much effort, creativity and, I'm assuming, cold hard cash, into creating such a creative and brain-tickling promo campaign that has absolutely got everybody's attention a rapid fire album release was a fairly natural assumption.
Lorde is pop royalty so her long awaited return deserved to be accompanied by an appropriate level of fanfare. I think we can all agree that soaking cars, beaches and cities in a hazy green light definitely qualifies.
And, mondo kudos for doing it all here as well. The world is Lorde's oyster and not many, if any, New Zealand artists could force the pop world's attention to focus squarely on little ol' Auckland.
But, the thing is, you only get to do all this once. The mysteries and the puzzles and the codes.
The whole thing with teasers is that they shift from intriguing to irritating incredibly quickly. Another slow-burn reveal will test both the patience and interest of all but the most hardcore of fans. Nobody likes being jerked around.
So here we all are. We've waited for it (.com). The song's out. Lorde's officially back. Now dish out them album deets and get on with things.
Because a greenlight traditionally only means one thing: go.